TITLE : Always With Me
PART : 3/
AUTHOR : Catherine
DISCLAIMER : Joss owns all
FEEDBACK : Please let me know if you like it.
(*...* thoughts)
"Why?" Giles was so angry now, that Buffy found herself in a confrontation with Ripper.
"You left me..." she said. He looked at her, then she added, "for my own good."
He stared at her, then remembered that day, eleven months earlier at the Magic Box, in the training room, maybe the most painful for him to have made that decision.
11 MONTHS EARLIER...IN THE TRAINING ROOM AT THE MAGIC BOX
Giles had just informed her about his intention to return to England. After that, Buffy had run out of the room while Giles just sat there.
Buffy hadn't left the Magic Box, but needed to have some time to 'digest' the news. After a moment, she came back in the room. Giles just looked at her while she approached him. Their eyes were locked on each other. Without a word, she caressed his cheek; putting her hand behind his head, she brought his head to her. Then, looking at each other with a passion greater than either of them could suspect, she kissed him. It was a kiss of passion, love, tender and need, and...they made love. The only words pronounced were 'I love you' from Buffy and Giles. Their lovemaking was amazing and there was just love.
Awaking some moments after, Buffy realized she was alone. Giles had left her...she saw the letter
My dear Buffy,
Forgive me, please forgive me. I love you more than anything
or anyone in the world, more than life itself. I'm yours since the
day of my birth, only yours. It what is so painful for me to let you;
but I must go, for you.
I can't stay here; seeing you, only the shadow of yourself. You count
on me, and I can't give you what you want from me. I just can't.
You're in my heart and soul.
Forgive me, my love.
Yours always,
R. Giles
She never told everyone about what happened that afternoon, until some weeks later...
PRESENT TIME
"Why? Why did you hide from me that you were pregnant? Do you hate me so much to not tell me!" It was pure Ripper.
Buffy began to cry. "Of course, not! I never hated you. I love you."
"So tell me why?"
"I didn't want to force you; I didn't want you think you should come back, feel obligated to come back. I wanted you come back because it was your wish and not because you knew about...I wanted that you have the choice." She was crying.
"You chose for me! You didn't let me choose. You did it for me, and you had no right! You stole that from me--your pregnancy, the birth...Have you any idea how...what that should have meant for me, to be here, with you. To share that with the woman I love!"
"You left me!" she was in tears, "Remember! For my own good, you said. So, tell me...tell me what I had to do. Tell you, and yes, I have no doubt that you would have come back, but for the wrong reason. Not because you thought that I could be fine like I am now, taking care of things, but because you would have been feeling obligated."
He glanced at her, in shock, and in a semblance of calm, he said before he left the house, "So you wanted to show me that you could take care of you and our baby. I see. What splendid evidence!" he said with sarcasm.
"No Giles, it's not that," Buffy said, between sobs.
"You hadn't the right to hide that from me." He whispered before he went outside, in the night.