Title: Once In A Lifetime 17/24
Author: Karen Jephson
Disclaimer: Not mine, unfortunately. Want to adopt and treat them better than their owners, but I don't have enough.
Feedback: Live for it.
Note: To Trich and Gail. Thanks for your nagging, your precise beta, and your constant encouragement.

Giles shifted once more, trying to find a more comfortable spot on the sofa. He'd forgotten how uncomfortable this particular piece of furniture was. Past experiences showed he'd get very little sleep this night.

He froze at the sound of a footfall on the stairs. Holding his breath, he waited to see what she would do. He was not aware that she'd come toward him until he felt her moon cast shadow fall over him. "I guess we can play the 'you're really asleep and I don't want to disturb you' game, or we can quit wasting time. After all, we don't have that much time together."

Giles smiled as he turned to look toward Buffy. "How did you know?"

The petite blonde shrugged. "I can tell the difference between awake Rupert and sleeping Rupert. He's more relaxed. 'Sides, you snore."

"I do not!" Giles spluttered as he rose to a sitting position.

"You do! Just a little. Sort of more like deeper breathing." Buffy perched herself on the coffee table, bringing them to a more equal height. "You gonna ask what I'm doing here?"

Giles smiled. "I was working up to that. I'm not sure if I want to know."

Buffy dropped her eyes. "I couldn't sleep. I was thinking about you and your Buffy. A-and how much it must have hurt. And I thought that maybe." She leaned forward as she spoke, her intent obvious to the man before her.

Giles leaned back, shocked at her forwardness. "Buffy! What do you think you 're doing?"

"Well, last night."

"Last night was a mistake." He paused at the look of hurt on her face. "I'm sorry. But you thought I was your husband, which I need remind you I'm not. And I thought.. Well, never mind what I thought. Last night was a mistake. But tonight would be you cheating on the man you profess to love."

"With himself?" Buffy stood up, obviously agitated. "Oh, I know it doesn't make sense. And I know most people would think it was wrong. But I don't think Rupert would. And I guess I thought I'd give you a good memory of what it could have been like. To ease your hurt."

Giles gentled his expression as he understood the gift she was offering him. "Except I'm not your Rupert. A-and Buffy and I never had that kind of relationship."

"Are you sure?" She raised her hand to stop him arguing. "Rupert and I were having one of those silly moments. You know, the kind that only people in love can. And I was telling him the exact moment I realized I was in love with him." She paused, remembering. "You do fill a tuxedo out very nicely, Mr. Giles." She sighed, then shook to clear her head. "But he couldn't tell me when he fell in love with me. And I was so hurt. But then he explained to me you see." She sat down on the coffee table again, leaning forward in her eagerness to make him understand. "He said he had definitely fallen in love by the time I was seventeen. But it had started before then. Things I did or said, certain glimpses of what was to come. His words not mine." She smiled sheepishly. "He began falling in love with the potential almost from the moment we met. He wouldn't have done anything about it on his own. In fact, most of the time he convinced himself it wasn't happening. But I made the first move you see."

"Yes, I understand that. But Buffy, what does this have to do with me?"

"I realized when I was lying up there in that big, lonely bed. Rupert started falling in love with me before the Cruciamentum. Before even when Angel came back from hell. So if Rupert loved me back then, you must have loved.." She stopped, halted by the shocked look on his face.

Giles sputtered, trying to deny the obvious. "I didn't. I-I'm not. I would never." He stopped, running his hand through his hair. He felt trapped, both physically and emotionally. The air closed in around him, adding a feeling of suffocation to the panic rushing through his body. Finally, he realized there was nowhere to run. He closed his eyes in defeat for a moment, then opened them to look at her. "Nobody knows. I never told anybody. She wouldn' t appreciate it you see. Being made to realize I was more than the dependable adult she pictured me as. And so I pushed it down. Pretended that what I felt was the love of a parent."

Buffy lifted her hand, wiping the tears that had begun to trail down his cheek. "Bet you've been choking on that for the past six years."

Giles emitted a half chuckle, before grasping her hand in his. "Yes it has. Thank you."

She smiled at him. "So, I thought that maybe."

Giles shook his head. "To go back to her thinking of me as an old man? A eunuch. Thank you for your offer. But even I'm not desperate enough for a pity fu."

"That's not it!" Buffy jumped up, angry that he would think such a thing. "I just wanted." She paused, her head bent away from him. "I'm scared. Tomorrow night it'll all be over. Either Rupert will be back, and we'll get back to normal. Or it won't work, and I'll lose him forever. Just for tonight, I wanted.."

Giles closed his eyes, pained at the look of vulnerability on her face. He hadn't thought how this was affecting her. And of the fears she would be experiencing about the actions the following day. He sighed, realizing that, for him, there was no choice. As always, he would put his Slayer's needs first. Even if she was only his for a few days.

Giles rose, moving closer to Buffy. Taking her hand in his, he led her toward the stairs. "That sofa is horrendous. If I'm going to spend the night making love, I'd rather concentrate on the person I'm with than count the number of lumps digging into my body."

Buffy giggled, a look of gratitude on her face. "Oh, I can guarantee the last thing you'll be thinking about is lumps. Well, those kinds anyway." Her impish grin was too wicked to resist. He lifted her hand, placing a kiss on the knuckles. "And it'll be different tonight. I mean, I practically raped you last night." She stopped, a look of horror on her face. "I didn't did I? I mean you tried to fight me, but.."

Giles placed another kiss on her hand before turning it over. He pressed his lips against her palm, enjoying the salty taste of her. "I tried to fight us both. I can resist my own temptations, but added to your attention, I was already lost. I'm afraid, Buffy, that I'm not as much of a gentleman as I pretend to be."

She giggled. "Rupert said the same thing after our first night." She moved beside him, and the two of them continued up the stairs side by side.

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