TITLE: Anchor (Part 11/16)
AUTHOR: Kerry Blackwell
PAIRING: Genfic - B/S and X/A as on the show
RATING: R
SPOILERS: Through "Wrecked" on Buffy and "Dad" on Angel
TIMELINE: Imagine it's about six weeks after those episodes and the ones we saw didn't happen.
DISCLAIMER: All things Buffy and Angel belong to Joss Whedon, the WB, UPN, FOX and Mutant Enemy and 20th Century Fox Film Corporation. I own only my genius (yeah, right!)
DISTRIBUTION: My site - White Hats - http://www.whitehats.co.nz (as soon as I'm well enough to code it and upload it) Any one else please ask first
FEEDBACK: Yes please!
THANKS: To Sarah for her editing assistance, and to Sarah and Ang for being ready to brainstorm with me when I begged appropriately.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I started this after seeing "Wrecked" and "Dad". My take on what could have happened next. It got totally Jossed immediately of course and since it takes me a long time to write anything, it got more and more AU as time went by. I had hoped to post it in the break, before anything _more_ happened, but I didn't manage it. Anyway, here it is. Just forget what happened after those two episodes and read my version. Please...

CHAPTER NOTE: "ahmic" is pronounced AH-vic and is about the only bit of IrishGaelic I know, having picked it up from a novel. It means "my son". (I think that's right.)

"Where's Angel?" Cordelia demanded as soon as she saw Buffy had come back downstairs alone.

_Yeah, there's something,_ Buffy thought in satisfaction. _Percepto-girl wins the point._

"He'll be down soon," she said simply.

She got a very challenging look from Cordelia in response, and was startled to discover that the girl she still thought of as an annoying and occasional side-kick could probably out-glare Giles if she put her mind to it. _Everyone changes,_ Buffy thought. _I should pay more attention._

The thought terrified her; it was an overwhelming concept, opening herself up to the world. It was easier to save it without looking, just doing her job. This was scary and dangerous. She felt her breathing tighten, going shallow, and tried to remember what Giles had told her out on the porch.

"Buffy?" It was Spike's voice, coming from a far distance. She glanced up and saw him trying to come to her. Giles shot out a hand and stopped the vampire, who rounded on him with a glare, and half of her was furious and half of her was grateful.

She thought of Rupert – Connor. Of his tiny baby's smile and perfect little fingers and toes. A new image came to mind; Angel and the look on his face as he saw his son, safely sleeping. The fierce protectiveness of Cordelia, Willow's painstaking determination to succeed, Dawn who was a part of her and a troubled teenager, both at the same time. Giles' steadfast loyalty and the way Spike cried her name as he loved her.

The world might be bright and harsh sometimes, but it contained beauty and friends, love and life. And they were all good things.

"Buffy?" It was Dawn's voice this time, sounding frightened.

"I'm okay," she promised her sister. "Really, I'm okay."

She saw Spike and Giles watching her, strangely united, and they both nodded, understanding.

"So," she said firmly, "what's the story with this Holtz guy?"

Wesley immediately took a breath, ready to launch into lecturer mode.

"Oh, spare us, Wes," Dawn begged.

"Dawnie," Willow said quietly, but it didn't exactly sound like she disagreed.

Dawn rolled her eyes and sighed. "Okay, Wesley, tell it all again. Then maybe we can get to the stuff we've got to tell you."

Wesley frowned. "What have you got to tell us?"

"About…" Dawn began and found herself interrupted by Buffy.

"I wasn't here. Tell me about Holtz." She wanted to give Angel time with Connor in private. Going on the worried looks on the faces around her, both he and Connor were going to get mobbed the instant they came downstairs. She wasn't going to let anyone go charging _up_ the stairs to interrupt.

She swallowed, taking a slow deep breath. This new Buffy scared _her_ at the moment, and she smiled at the thought of how her friends were going to react to this version of Buffy; someone who actually noticed people around her and even thought about their feelings. The thought was enough to ground her again, anchor her once more.

It might be hard, but she made herself a promise right then and there, that she wasn't going to lose this new feeling. For the first time since she had been Called, she felt properly connected to the world and the people in it, and the idea of losing that connection terrified her more than the risk of opening up to the people around her.

"…us and Darla."

Wesley looked at her expectantly and she realised he'd been explaining, just as she had asked him to, and she'd missed it all. She nodded and tried to look intelligent, hoping that would be enough for him.

It seemed to work.

"We don't know how he arrived in the twenty-first century, but he's here and he's after Angel and Connor."

Buffy flicked a glance at Spike. "And this is the guy we saw in the graveyard?"

He nodded.

"He had a demon and a couple of humans with him," Buffy told Wesley, who nodded.

"He's kinda crazy," Fred offered helpfully.

"How surprising," Giles commented, his tone laced with a serious overdose of irony.

"So how do you know about this Holtz?" Willow asked Spike. "If he disappeared like years before you were born?"

The blond shrugged. "Angelus liked to boast."

"Oh." Cordelia's voice was flat and uninflected, as if she didn't like the reminder of who Angel had been. A moment later she followed it up with an hysterical shriek. "Oh! Oh, my God! Connor!"

She was off the chair and across the room almost as fast as a vampire could move. She skidded to a stop in front of Angel and claimed the baby from his arms before he had a chance to protest.

Connor was swept into the air, gurgling in delight as Cordelia cooed baby-nonsense at him. In an instant she was surrounded as Wesley, Fred and Gunn descended upon her, all talking at once.

Angel watched his family and smiled. He looked up to see Buffy watching _him_, a strange look on her face. Realising she'd been caught, she smiled and shrugged and he found himself grinning back.

Spike's words of long ago echoed in his mind. _You'll never be friends._ If he was honest, they never _had_ been friends. Maybe now they had a chance to try. He nodded to her and waded into the melee to reclaim his son.

"So what's the plan?" Buffy demanded.

Exclamations and explanations were over – for the time being at least – and the extended group, now including Xander and Anya as well, were trying to settle down to solve the current problem.

Angel had Connor back in arms again and didn't show any indication that he was planning to let him go any time soon. Cordelia had hovered nearby until Angel had moved over and she had squeezed into the chair at his side, looking much happier, although Buffy couldn't decide if it was the proximity to Connor or to Angel that had improved her mood.

Fred and Gunn were sharing another armchair, making Wesley look strangely alone as he sat on an upright chair borrowed from the dining table. Giles and Spike were sharing the sofa with Buffy, neither appearing to be entirely happy with that situation, while Willow and Dawn were sitting on the carpet and Xander and Anya had commandeered the rug.

There were more people in the house than Buffy could easily remember, unless she went back as far as the fateful welcome home party that had been gate-crashed by zombies years earlier. It was certainly more people than she had been comfortable with lately and she was amazed to find that she was okay with it.

"The plan," she repeated.

Uncertain looks were exchanged.

"Kill the bastards," Spike offered helpfully into the silence.

"I can live with that," Angel agreed easily.

Xander gave them both a disgusted look. "Vampires," he grumbled.

Spike and Angel exchanged understanding glances, then quickly looked away as they each realised what they were doing.

"We need more information," Giles interjected before any blood was spilt. Or anyone got eaten.

Willow nodded vigorously. "More information," she agreed. Her face fell. "But how are we going to get it? I've been doing the web search thing and haven't found anything."

"Try chosenkid.com," Fred suggested. "Or angelus.com. Or nyaziainchild.com. Or dissect-the-baby.net."

Willow went white. "You're kidding."

Cordelia shook her head. "There are more. And they're just the ones we've found so far." Her hand brushed across Connor's head in an instinctive, protective gesture. "But they don't help here anyway. We need to find out what Harmony was going to do with him."

"And unfortunately she's dust," Buffy said. "Sorry about that, guys. I didn't know we needed to keep her around."

"We could beat it out of Gavin and Lilah," Gunn suggested hopefully.

"Who?" several voices asked.

"They're lawyers from Wolfram and Hart," Wesley explained, sounding like he was talking about something he's scrape off his shoes. They're in Sunnydale; they were our lead to come here."

"I'm sure I could eat a lawyer," Spike offered.

Without thinking, Buffy reached out and thumped his nearest extremity, which happened to be his arm. It wouldn't have been hard enough to hurt a human, let alone a vampire, but as she realised what she'd done she turned to him with a stricken face.

He just shrugged and smiled that sexy smile. "They don't count as human, do they?"

"Not these ones," Cordelia said firmly.

"No eating," Buffy insisted.

Spike scowled. "You take the fun out of everything." But his tone was mild.

"This is going nowhere," Anya announced in her typically straight forward way. "Will the lawyers tell?"

Buffy was shaking her head, remembering something. "There was this guy with Holtz. I reckon he'd break easily. We ask him."

"The pansy boy?" Spike nodded. "He'd talk."

"Do you know where he is, though?" Giles asked.

"Yeah, we know where Gavin and Lilah are," Gunn pointed out. "We can find them."

"I can ask around," Spike offered.

"You're a vampire," Giles said slowly, ignoring the 'duh!' look that Spike gave him. "If you can find the cultists, you've got the best chance of learning more from them. And it's less likely to tip off our enemies."

"Spike is kind of known as being the Slayer's lapdog these days," Xander commented. "They might not tell him." He paused. "They might stake him. Hey, Spike, go ahead."

"Very funny," Spike growled, more warmed that he would ever admit by the glare Buffy directed at her friend.

"They're new in town," Wesley said thoughtfully. "They may not know about the, ah, local politics." He looked at Spike. "Lapdog?"

Spike growled again. "Shaddup, Watcher."

Angel managed not to smile. "We're going to have to talk, William."

"At least I didn't turn into a total poofter," Spike snapped back.

Angel opened his mouth to reply, but was stopped by a cry from Dawn.

"Stop it!" she yelled. She sniffed. "Stop yelling." She swallowed noisily and looked at Buffy. "What are we going to do?"

Buffy was about to answer, but something made her stop. This might be her town, but it was Angel's son they were trying to protect. It was still a bizarre thought – Angel's son – but it was getting more familiar and _normal_ by the moment.

"Angel?" she asked instead.

She was more surprised when he didn't answer either. He just looked across the room. "Wes?"

Wesley nodded. "If Spike is willing, I believe the cultists are the best place to start. As Giles said, they appear to be our best chance to gain information without tipping off our enemies to our presence."

"I'm going too." Angel's voice was flat.

"Yeah, right," Xander snorted. "Daddy goes along and the weirdos who want his baby spill their guts. Like that's going to happen."

Cordelia glared at him, a patent-Cordelia glare that rolled off him just as it always had. But when she spoke to Angel, her voice was gentle. "He's right, Angel. We're gonna have to let Spike do it."

"Don't mess it up." Angel's voice was a growl, low and barely contained.

For once, Spike didn't make a snide remark. He just nodded. "Relax, Peaches. I'll be careful."

"Spike." Giles sounded a little distant, as if only part of him was in the room with them, the rest miles away and lost in thought. "Make it sound like you're just confirming things you already know."

Buffy grinned. "My Watcher's having an idea."

"It's still only a glimmer," Giles warned. "But I think it has potential."

"So, I'll be going then." Spike stood, then unable to resist the chance to stir up trouble, leaned down again and kissed Buffy on the cheek. "Later, luv."

And he was gone before she could respond.

Unsure if she was mad at him or amused, Buffy waited for the storm to break. Sure, ninety percent of the people in the room knew now, even if they were still processing the information, but there were two who didn't, and one of them was about to explode.

He did.

"What the _hell_ was _that_?" Xander screeched in an hysterical voice.

"It was a kiss," his fiancé told him matter-of-factly. "Spike kissed Buffy."

"I saw that," Xander confirmed. "But I was hoping I was having some massive, private – and very disturbing – hallucination."

"Leave it, Xander," Buffy warned.

His head jerked up to stare at her. "Buffy?"

"Leave it," she repeated. "Leave Spike alone, leave me alone, leave us alone."

"You're an _us_?" Xander still sounded like he was being strangled.

Buffy nodded.

"This is some post-resurrection, trauma thing, right?"

"It was," Buffy conceded. "But we're going to see if it can be something else."

"He's a _vampire_." Xander gaze flicked to Angel. "I can't believe I'm saying this, by at least Deadboy here has a soul."

"Spike has a chip," Dawn retorted, jumping to her sister's defence. Grateful for the support, Buffy all the same shushed Dawn with a look.

"I'm okay, Xander," she said softly, seriously. "I can look after myself again now. I'm the boss of me, not Spike. So just leave it, okay?"

Xander didn't look happy, but he nodded reluctantly. "I can still disapprove in private, right?"

Buffy laughed, the kind of bright, cheerful sound none of them had heard lately. "I wouldn't have it any other way," she promised.

Xander, hearing it, just nodded. He still didn't like it, he'd probably never like it, but a Buffy who laughed, who was calm and certain like this, that was a miracle that had been missing for too long. He'd leave it, like she asked. But he would go and have a long, private talk to Spike as soon as he got the chance. It wasn't like Spike could hurt him. Of course, he couldn't hurt Buffy either, at least not physically. And that thought made him feel a little better. But if Spike hurt Buffy in any other way, he was going to be a big pile of dust before he could even blink.

"Okay," Xander agreed, giving Buffy a smile. "I'll leave it. In public, anyway. And for now."

She nodded back. "That's good enough."

Fred yawned, breaking the serious mood, and looked terribly, terribly embarrassed as everyone turned to look at her.

"Long day," she mumbled. "Sorry."

Buffy jumped to her feet, glad of the distraction. "Oooh, I get to be hostessy Buffy." She looked around, mentally counting the number of people in her living room. Angel, Connor, Cordelia. Fred, Gunn. Wesley. Willow and Dawn. Giles. Xander and Anya. And her and Spike, even if he wasn't there right now. Thirteen. Way, way too many.

"Oh," she said slowly. "I don't think I have room for you all to stay here."

Willow followed her lead, reinforcing the change of subject. "Cordelia and Fred, you can have my bed if you don't mind sharing. I can move into Dawn's room if Giles…"

"I can get a hotel room," Giles offered again.

Buffy shook her head firmly. "We shouldn't split up that much. You can have the couch." She looked at Xander and Anya. "Can you guys take Wesley and Gunn and all be back here in the morning for another war conference?"

Xander nodded. "Easy."

Anya opened her mouth to say something and he nudged her in the side. "Easy," she repeated, even if her face suggested she's been going to say something else altogether.

Buffy looked at Angel, her biggest problem. She bit back a smile. It seemed nothing had changed there. "You, I'd normally offer the basement or send to stay with Spike," she said slowly. "But there's Connor, and I guess you don't really want him in the basement _or_ a crypt."

Angel looked at his son, who had remained sleeping quietly through all the discussion. "Not really," he admitted. "I could…" He stopped without finishing the sentence.

"I think Angel and I can manage to share the living room," Giles said slowly. "We could bring the cradle down here for Connor." He gave Angel a sharp look. "But we're not sharing the couch. _I_ get the couch."

Angel nodded. "I probably won't sleep much," he said quietly. "And I can sleep in a chair if I need to."

Buffy, newly perceptive Buffy, was watching Giles. "Are you really okay with that?" she asked. "Because if we think more, I'm sure we can come up with something. Or Connor can stay here and Angel can go to Spike's."

Giles saw the alarm flash across Angel's face, the way his arms tightened around the baby, and despite his own personal feelings about the other man, he shook his head. Angel had just found his son again; he shouldn't have to leave him in the care of others immediately because of something that was past and supposed to be forgotten.

Except that you never forgot. And the grateful, ashamed look on Angel's face suggested he hadn't forgotten either.

Buffy could see the tension, but didn't have a clue how to do anything about it. "Right," she said instead. "It's a plan. So, let's start moving furniture. Angel, can you let go of Connor long enough to move the crib?"

Angel looked like he might have protested, but Cordelia claimed the baby and gave his father a push towards the stairs. "Of course he can. Go on, Angel."

Left with no other choice, Angel did as he was told. Buffy sent Dawn to find spare sheets. Looking at the sudden explosion of activity, Xander and Anya collected their own share of guests and departed, promising to be back the next morning.

NEXT