Title: Betrayal
Author: LadyForASH
Rated: NC17
Spoilers: Season Six, shortly after Smashed.
Pairing: G/B
Summary: Giles can't stay away, but finds Buffy in a compromising situation upon his return.
Disclaimer: You know that nothing belongs to me. Joss created it all. Please don't sue!
Mrsdrake gave me the idea for this plot bunny. I was in the mood for angst.
Feedback is a great motivator...
Giles just couldn't do it anymore. He couldn't look at the glazed expression on Buffy's face. He couldn't watch her go through the motions, existing, but no longer living. He couldn't bear the burden of knowing what Willow had taken from Buffy. Heaven. Peace. Rest. But mostly, he couldn't take his feelings anymore.
He knew they were not reciprocated. Perhaps at one time, they had a chance. That year before Glory had stolen his Buffy away. His Slayer. Before he'd told Buffy he'd sacrifice Dawn. Before…all of that pain. Perhaps if he had acted on his feelings, he would have had a chance to show her his love. But he'd been scared, so he hadn't. And now, it was too late.
He thought leaving would be the right thing. It would force Buffy to live again. It would make her at least recognize her responsibilities. But the pain in her eyes had stricken him to his very core.
Rupert Giles had returned to England, and then got right back on the plane again and flew back to Sunnydale. It was his home now. Buffy was his home now. He'd find a way to reach her. His love was strong enough, he reasoned. He'd just have to get past his own insecurities and fears to at least bring her back to living again.
It was night when his plane landed. He was tired and cranky from the long flight, and despondent about the way he'd left. He claimed to love her, and then he'd abandoned her like that? How could he do that! He berated himself again and again.
Buffy wasn't at home. He couldn't find her in the various cemeteries, so he didn't think she was patrolling. On a whim he stepped into the Bronze.
The club literally throbbed with music. It was almost erotic. In his Ripper days, he'd find some bird and show her a good time. The atmosphere screamed of passion and desire and need. The darkness was tempting. Giles immediately recognized what Buffy would be looking for there. It would be an escape from the harsh realities of the day. The blaring music would drown out everything. The pumping and throbbing from the speakers called to the basis of one's needs. It pulled you in and helped you forget for awhile. It poured into all the pain inside, and dulled the sharp edges.
He scanned the dance floor but didn't see her. Still, he knew she was there. He could almost feel her. Slowly he made his way up the stairs to the loft. He remembered when she'd first arrived here in Sunnydale. They'd leaned over the bars of this very balcony and looked down on the crowd. Buffy had said they were all lucky to not realize the danger that surrounded them at every twist and turn. Oblivion was kind in that way. What you didn't know couldn't hurt you, wasn't that what they said?
Giles was mulling that over when he came around a shadowed corner and saw a familiar shape. A leather jacket, and bleach blonde hair. Spike. Giles sighed. At least Spike could probably help him find Buffy. He was taking another step near the vampire when he realized what was going on. Spike's hips were moving…and not in time to the music. No, it was a rhythm as old as man. That's when he saw the petite blonde that Spike was surrounding. He heard the moan and saw the vampire's hips convulse. Disgusted, Giles turned to walk away when he heard the woman gasp. The sound of her voice sent shivers deep into the Watcher's soul. His head turned and that's when he saw them both in profile. It was Buffy. His Buffy. His Slayer. And it was Spike that was deep inside.