Title: Betrayal
Author: LadyForASH
Rated: NC17
Disclaimer: You know that nothing belongs to me. Joss created it all. Please don't sue!
Feedback is a great motivator...
Giles went to the Magic Box. He had no where else to go. He certainly was not returning to the Summer's residence, and his flat was now rented to someone else. Thankfully Anya hadn't changed the locks, he mused. He let himself into the back training room and flopped down onto the sofa.
Of course sleep did not come.
He looked like hell in the morning. Anya was shocked to see him at all, but even more so in his condition. He refused to talk about it, and for once she was wise enough not to press.
It was later that morning when the bell announced visitors. Giles looked up from the table where he was sitting, pretending to read a book, and saw Dawn and Buffy. He saw the look pass between the sisters. Buffy must have told Dawn that Giles was back, but he was sure she left out most of the intimate details.
The Watcher didn't even hear all that Dawn said. He saw her mouth moving, but he didn't hear the words. He did hear Buffy announce that she was going to train. Without another look at him, the Slayer slunk into the back training room and closed the door.
Silence reined in the shop. Anya cleared her throat. Dawn looked between the two owners, wondering what she should do now.
Giles sighed heavily and stood up. "Dawn, why don't you head home? I'm sure you have homework to do?"
Dawn looked like she was about to protest but then didn't. She nodded and smiled sadly at Giles. "You'll make sure she gets home okay?" It was strange, this reversal. Suddenly Dawn felt like she needed to take care of Buffy.
"I will," Giles said. He watched Dawn leave and then with a heavy heart he walked back to the training room. Slowly he opened the door and stepped inside, closing and locking the door behind him.
Buffy was standing in the middle of the room. He saw her stiffen when he entered, but other then that she didn't move. She didn't look up at him. She didn't turn away. She just stood there, with her shoulders slumped and her head down.
Giles could almost physically see the walls push up and thicken around the woman he loved. Yes, he loved her still. He needed to love her. He wanted to love her. At this moment, mostly…he wanted to help her. Pushing aside his own pain and need, Giles walked to Buffy.
Her face was tilting up then. He could tell by the look in her eyes and the set of her jaw that she was going to say something harsh. She wasn't going to do anything but defend herself and lash out to hurt him. Misery truly did love company. But Giles halted her when his arms went around her and he pulled her against his chest in a fierce hug.
No words passed. He held her until he could feel her body begin to relax, and then slump against him. She started to cry. The tears coursed down her cheeks and the sobs racked her body. Her grief was loud as well as deep. Her body became like a rag doll in his arms. His own knees became weak and he lowered both of them to the floor. He held her tightly as her anguish cries soaked his chest. Softly he murmured to her, whispering her name and consoling her. He kissed the top of her head. "I'm here, Buffy. I'm here…"
When she was exhausted the sobbing turned into sniffles and gasps. Still he held her. He had no idea how much time passed until she finally looked up at him. The wall was gone, but all that was left was an empty shell.
"I have an idea," he said softly. "There is a place I like to go sometimes…"
Buffy didn't protest. He took her home and waited while she packed a bag. His own suitcase rested beside hers in the trunk of a rental. As Giles drove, Buffy slept. They didn't speak a single word as he drove all evening and into the night.
When they reached their destination, Buffy was surprised to see a little cabin on the beach. Giles carried a suitcase in each hand and then set them down on the little porch to unlock the door. He didn't explain, but merely showed her to a bedroom.
She cleaned up and changed while he made a light supper for them in the kitchen. There was no small talk as they ate their chicken breasts and spinach salad, and sipped warm honey tea. She called Dawn while he did the dishes, and then they both went to their separate rooms for the rest of the night.
In the morning Giles was the first to wake up. He showered and changed and then put out some fruit and rolls and made some tea. He snagged a book with his breakfast tray and went out onto the back porch.
His breakfast went uneaten, although he did occasionally sip from his tea. The book sat in his lap, but most of the time he watched the waves of the ocean caress the sandy beach. The tide was going out, and it was as if the water captured all the grit of the Earth and washed it clean as it pulled it out to sea, only to redeposit it later, fresh and new.
Giles looked up as he heard the squeak of the screen door. Buffy emerged. Her hair was tied up in a little bun on her head and she wore a pale yellow sweatshirt and jeans. Her feet were bare, and she had a cup of tea in her hands. She stood for a moment and took in the beauty of the morning, and then sunk into a chair opposite Giles.
"How are you feeling?" he finally asked. He'd closed his book and now clasped his hands in his lap.
"Tired," Buffy admitted. "Which is kinda weird since all I've done lately is sleep."
"Not at all," Giles explained softly. "Your body is healing and you've been under a terrible stress and strain lately. You're exhausted."
Silence fell once again. Between them there was so much that needed to be said. Explanations, declarations, rage, pain, sorrow…but nothing would come.
Finally Giles cleared his throat and Buffy looked at him. She waited, almost bracing herself for whatever he was about to say, knowing she deserved his anger and more.
Giles took a deep breath. "I love you," he whispered.