Lily2332 - Bad Judgement 4/10

TITLE: Bad Judgement 4/10
AUTHOR: Lily2332
FEEDBACK: Yes!
DISCLAIMER: They’re not mine, don’t sue.

PART FOUR: BETRAYED

Buffy stood in front of the mirror, brushing her hair that she’d just finished blow-drying. A stray piece kept going the wrong direction, and finally, she pulled it all back with a clip. She felt different, and examined her reflection to see if it showed on the outside. She found no changes, and knew that it had everything to do with what had happened last night. No more candy.......Giles would be awakening soon, and she had to clutch the edge of the sink to keep herself from fleeing, through the woods all the way back to Sunnydale.

Giles squinted. It was damn sunny today, too sunny for his bedroom, which received the evening sun. He sat upright, the previous days events rushing back to him full force. Buffy and he had......why had he been acting so horribly? He had been relentless in his pursuance of the girl, and had even been smoking, he remembered as he pulled his clothes on, picking up the scent of smoke of them. Then he remembered the candy. She had given it to him.....a sick feeling washed over the man. Why would she trick him so cruelly? Hadn’t she known how it would make him? She should have known how Ripper would treat her, how he would pressure her.

Then he recalled the tears that she had cried as he had made love to her; the brief look of misery on her face. He hadn’t even stopped, hadn’t cared that she didn’t want it. Giles covered his face with his hand, hating himself. Anyone who hurt his slayer found themselves the recipient of his unbridled anger, and this time it was he himself who had hurt her. Then the anger turned. Buffy had been the one who had cheerfully given him the candy.

"Why!?" He shouted, standing, bringing everyone to the top of the stairs, Buffy included.

He stood in the middle of the large room, staring up at Buffy with the most painfully betrayed look in his eyes. "Why?" He repeated, softly this time, as though pain alone had sapped his strength.

"Guys, can you get gone for a while?" She tried to speak through the lump in her throat. Willow hesitated for a moment, sensing the enormity of what Buffy had to account for, but followed the two boys down the stairs and outside.

The cabin suddenly seemed like a tomb, empty, cold, and very quiet. Giles climbed the stairs, and she took a few steps back away from him. The betrayal she saw in his face was like a weapon, and she wanted to get as far away from it as possible.

But there he stood, facing her. "Why?" he asked again, sadly. "Because I did it to you? The bloody test? Is it what I deserve?" Part of the reason he asked was because he truly wondered.

Buffy had never felt as ashamed as she did at that moment, but part of her was crying in protest. They had made love last night, and it was too similar to what had happened with Angel, receiving hate and not love the morning after. But she had brought it all on herself this time, and that fact alone kept her from tears. She didn’t deserve the cleansing relief that tears would offer.

"Giles-" she began, her voice breaking as she looked at his face, seeing what she had done to him. "You hate me-"

"-Yes!" He interrupted, his jaw clenched. "I never thought it would be possible, Buffy, but right now at this moment, I hate you! I hate you for breaking my trust, for manipulating me, for-" he broke off, not wanting to bring up the real reason of his rage.

His words were worse than any kind of sword to her already tender heart, and Buffy turned from her watcher, and from his hatred, running down the steps, fleeing from his agonized green eyes and anything else he could say to her.