Title: Belonging (1/12)
Author: Luisa
Email: leyjd@hotmail.com
Pairing: B/R, B/G
Rating: Most definitely NC-17
Distribution: Dword's LIST, Kattie, TL, Dee. Anyone else? Just ask :)
Summary: Set mid season 4; Buffy has to decide between the two men in her life. [Gee, that's a difficult one, huh? ;)]
Spoilers: Anything up to Hush
Disclaimer: None of the characters are mine, they belong to Joss et al. I'm just playin' with them... giving them what they *really* want before handing them back as if they'd never been touched. <Innocent smile>
Feedback: Pretty, pretty please. with Giles on top?
Notes: A word to all my B/G 'Shipper friends out there: sorry for the B/R... it's only one chapter... and it's not that bad... not really... ;) Oh, and the usual: [thoughts] *emphasis*
Thanks: Thank you so much Gail for doing such a thorough beta, for all your comments and suggestions, and for... *ahem*... 'educating' me. <EG>
Dedication: To Donna - Happy Birthday! Thanks for continuing to inspire and encourage me... I hope you like your pressie and that you have a wonderful day.
He pounded into her with everything that he had. Grinning to himself in the dark, he reflected the truth of that statement. He *could* give her everything he had - in life and in sex. He could be as rough as he liked and she would take it - unlike so many other women who liked it slow and tender. But no, Buffy would take it. She was after all, The Slayer. She had strength no other woman could possibly imagine having. not to mention the incredible stamina that was... well, it was beyond description. Yes, he thought to himself as her hips rose to meet his thrusts, sometimes he hated that she was the Slayer, but it did have its rewards. As he mused this her walls began to clench around his, the approach to her climax encouraging his own. Her cries became desperate as she dug her nails into his shoulders.
[Okay,] he thought to himself, [Maybe not *that* rough - I like my skin the way it is, thank you.] He gritted his teeth, dwelling on her strength as positively as possible as her walls contracted painfully around him. Her sudden cry halted his train of thought.
"Oh god, yes. I'm c." She didn't get to finish her sentence as orgasm suddenly overtook her. She clutched at him wildly, arching into him. "Oh yes, oh yes. Giiillleesss"
It was too late to go back now, he realised as he teetered on the brink despite the anger that filled his mind. He let go, driving into her with as much force as he could muster in an attempt to remind her just who she belonged to. He spilled his hot seed into the sheath that separated him from her, and wished - not for the first time - that he had the nerve to "accidentally" use a damaged one. Only the reminder of his responsibilities prevented him from entering into that type of commitment. Reluctantly Riley withdrew from her channel and disposed of the condom, before returning to the bed - only to find his lover curled into a tight ball as far away from him as possible. Stifling a sigh, he lay down and slid over to where she lay, drawing her still form into his arms.
"That was amazing. You... you were..." He swallowed hard, "you were sensational... as always." The air remained still and silent and he hugged his arms more tightly around her, desperately wanting to bring her back to him; aware that she wasn't really there. "I do love you, you know, Buffy."
A whisper of a breath escaped her lips in answer and she at last uncurled and turned to face him for a brief moment. "I know." Pulling out of his embrace, she reached out to where she last remembered seeing her shirt and finding it, sat up and pulled it on. Again she turned to him, this time searching his eyes for something. Realising that she would never find it there - in *that* set of eyes - she wordlessly got out of the bed and finished dressing. [He can never be him. He'll never love me the way I want... but still, he loves me the only way he knows how... and maybe... maybe in time I could love him too...] Her thoughts were halted as Riley spoke softly into her ear, having moved off the bed and wrapped his arms around her waist from behind.
"Come back to bed." He nibbled persuasively on her earlobe, before moving his kisses to her neck and shoulders. He groaned as she pulled away yet again.
"I have to patrol." It was clear she wouldn't be persuaded: her voice was gentle yet firm and she made her way to the door, only looking back once she got there.
Riley fought the urge to run to her; to demand answers. Instead he spoke quietly, "Buffy, please... tell me what's wrong, let me know what's going on... let me... let me into your life." He hated this - this pathetic begging, but he could no longer bear being on the outside. "Tell me so I can fix it. Is it me? Aren't I good enough for you?"
Buffy blew out a long breath. "It isn't you, Riley. You're... you're perfect. Really, you are. Exactly what any girl could possibly wish for."
"But what about you?" He persisted, desperately seeking some sort of emotion on her part. "Am I what *you* want? What *you* would wish for?"
She looked down at her feet. "Of course you are. Why else do you think I'm with you?"
He sank onto the bed, suddenly wishing this were all a bad nightmare. "Look Buffy, you go patrol. I'll be waiting for you when you come back. I think we both need some time to... uh... to think."
She could only nod awkwardly in agreement before fleeing into the night.