TITLE: Journey's End 10/10
AUTHOR: Rari Coss
EMAIL ADDRESS: RariCoss1956@yahoo.com
DISCLAIMER: It all belongs to Joss, the real king of the world, the WB, UPN, Fox, Mutant Enemy and anybody else who feels they own it. I’m just borrowing, lost in admiration, and then giving them back, memories wiped clean.
FEEDBACK: Absolutely.

Buffy blew out a big breath and tried to get past the butterflies going crazy in her stomach. Giles saw the nervousness on her face. “Buffy, you don’t have to tell me.”

“No, I want to tell you. I’m just a little…remember that new terrain thing I was telling you about?” Giles nodded. “Okay, just keep that in mind. Like I said, you stayed for this one too and it was rough at first but eventually we all got happy. I broke up with Spike.” She looked up at Giles expecting to see an incredulous look but instead she found him looking at her with such sadness and compassion. She figured it out right away. “I got together with him in your journey too, didn’t I?”

Giles nodded. “It’s all right, Buffy. I understand how it could have happened, why you were…potentially are… drawn to him.”

“Were. The word is definitely were.” Buffy shivered. She had gotten so lost so quickly. It frightened her still to think about it, to think about what might have happened.

“Buffy, are you all right?”

“Yeah, just thinking about what ifs, kind of a spooky place.” She looked at Giles. “But I’m thinking you know that.”

Giles nodded again. “Yes, a very, as you say, spooky place.”

“Okay, so I broke up with Spike, you and Dawn were doing the father daughter thing big time. You, by the way, wonderful dad.” That did get a surprised look from Giles and Buffy grinned. “So, anyway, I let Dawn spend the night at a friend’s house and I cooked dinner.” That got another surprised look and Buffy smacked him lightly on the knee. “Hey, I can cook. I cooked us Thanksgiving dinner, didn’t I?”

“Yes, you did. I humbly apologize. One meal in four years. How could I be so unkind as to mock you?”

“Okay, I can tell you’re feeling better when you pull the big sarcasm guns out. Can I get back to my story?”

Giles grinned but he wanted to hear the rest. “Buffy, please, go on. You were cooking me dinner…?”

“Yes, I cooked us dinner and you kept waiting for me to ask you for some big favor. Again, I could tell what you were thinking. Not the me in the future.”

“Right, you, I got it. So, what was the favor?”

“No favor. I was just cooking dinner.” As an expression of disbelief showed up on Giles’ face Buffy made a face back at him. Then she continued. “So, after dinner we went into the living room, oh, and you were living there, in the house. So we went into the living room to watch the video Dawn asked you to pick up, which by the way, nice job, total smut.”

“I picked up a movie like that for Dawn?” Giles was horrified.

“Well, in your defense, you had no idea. You’d just gotten what she asked for. So anyway…” Buffy’s voice was getting faster. “All this sex stuff comes on and we’re just sitting there and you’re teasing me for getting embarrassed and then you got mad at me when I sounded like I didn’t think you’d ever had sex.”

“What?”

“See, that’s exactly what you said to me then, too. You said, ‘Buffy, it’s just sex, you’ve had it, I’ve had it’. And I said, ‘you’ve had sex?’” She gestured to Giles. “And you got all annoyed and said ‘What?’ in that oh-so-annoyed-with-Buffy voice you have.”

“Well, you can hardly blame me.” He shook his head at Buffy. “Honestly Buffy. I know you’ve always thought I was one step away from an old folk’s home…”

“Yeah, I know, sorry about that. Well, just to make it worse I said something like, well of course you’ve had sex, you know, Giles’ sex. Which at the time made sense to me, like any sex you might have had took place in a Giles’ universe, far, far away from me.”

“Tell me again why were you shown this? Where on earth is this all leading to?”

Buffy flashed him a nervous grin. “I’m getting there. So, you got even more annoyed, big surprise I know, but I just put the movie back on. And we watched some more sex. Which you seemed particularly interested in. You kept saying how real it looked.” Buffy blew out another nervous breath. “Then, while you were so preoccupied by the TV I started looking at you, and you know what I saw?”

“I’m afraid to even hazard a guess.”

“I’ll tell you then. A gorgeous sexy guy. Right there in front of me, both of me’s. You changed from Giles, book guy, to Giles, hunk.” She snapped her fingers. “Just that fast.” At Giles’ stunned look she continued. “Well, you happened to look up and you saw something in my eyes and we just stared at each other. Then the next thing I knew we were both kissing, and then we were shagging like bunnies, and six months later we were married. And both of us were so happy, happier than either of us ever imagined we could be. You and me.”

Giles’ eyes were sort of glazed over and Buffy stood. “Boy, I missed dinner didn’t I? Come on; let’s go back. Think Lindsey would reheat something for me?” When he didn’t answer she reached down and pulled him up. “Giles, do you think she would reheat something for me?”

Giles tried to focus. “What? Oh, yes, I’m sure she would.” He ran a hand through his hair and Buffy grinned at the still dazed look on his face. She began to pull him back to the house. This had been as far as she’d gotten on her strategy. Tell him, and then let it stew. Let him take the next step. Surely she didn’t need to do it all.

Giles allowed Buffy to pull him back to the house. He occasionally tripped over something but Buffy’s strength kept him from falling. The ending of that future had knocked his socks off. He couldn’t seem to get past it. Him and Buffy. Him and Buffy having sex. Him and Buffy married. Him and Buffy happy. Really happy. Giles tried to pull himself together when they arrived back at the house. Both Lindsey and the Shaman were sitting there, much as Giles had left them.

They both looked up as Buffy and Giles arrived. And they both bit back smiles at the look on Giles’ face, and the nervous grin on Buffy’s. Lindsey looked at Buffy. “Would you like me to heat you up some supper, Buffy?”

“I was hoping you’d ask me that.”

The Shaman took another look at Rupert and just headed for the freezer, pulling out some ice cream. He filled a bowl and slid it in front of Giles, handing him a spoon. Barely acknowledging the Shaman, Giles took the spoon and began to eat. The Shaman looked up at Buffy. “I see that he found you. He was worried about you.”

She nodded. “He found me. We talked. I told him that he could go home to England if he wanted to. That I’d be okay now without him.”

“Ah, and what did Rupert decide?”

Buffy frowned. “He hasn’t told me yet.” She leaned towards the Shaman and touched her temple a couple of times with her index finger. “Can you see inside his head and tell me what he’s thinking? He could be lost in there for days. I’ve seen it happen.”

The Shaman let out a laugh. “I can see, but I will not tell you what he’s thinking. I will tell you that you might want to ask him again.”

Buffy’s eyes lit up. “Yeah?” The Shaman nodded. Lindsey hurried in, obviously called by her husband not to miss this. “Okay.” Buffy turned to Giles and patted him on the arm to get his attention. When that didn’t work she took his ice cream away.

Giles looked at her, spoon poised mid air. He looked down at his ice cream bowl, now resting in front of her. “Why did you take my ice cream away?”

Buffy almost giggled at the little boy expression on his face. “I’ll give it right back, I just need to ask you a question.”

“What? What’s the question?”

“Are you going home to England?”

Giles put the spoon in his mouth and unhurriedly licked off the ice cream as he looked at Buffy. He reached his hand out and slowly retrieved his bowl of ice cream. Giles watched Buffy watch him, seemingly mesmerized by his movements. He smiled and shook his head. “No, I don’t think so. I think I’m going to stay.”

He was rewarded by one of Buffy’s brilliant smiles. “Really? You’re really staying?” At Giles’ nod she turned her head to Lindsey and the Shaman. “He’s staying.” Her eyes filled with tears and she turned back to Giles. “You’re staying with me.” This time is was she who pulled him in for a hug, squeezing hard enough to get a grunt out of him. She started to cry.

Giles grew concerned. “Buffy, I’m sorry…”

She interrupted him. “No, no, this is me being happy. I’m happy.” She continued to sob into his shirtfront. Giles looked up at his two friends and shrugged his shoulders. They both just grinned at him and he grinned back, his arms tight around Buffy.

Lindsey went and retrieved Buffy’s dinner and the smell of the food finally encouraged her tears to stop. Shiny eyed and red nosed, she pulled back and sniffed the air appreciably, looking at Lindsey. “God, I’m going to miss your food.” She hiccupped and blushed.

Lindsey just smiled at Buffy. “You can come and visit any time you’d like.”

Buffy grinned. “Really? I can come visit whenever I want?”

Lindsey nodded. “Rupert never visits as often as we’d like him to. Maybe you can get him to come here more often.”

Buffy frowned looking at Giles. “Why don’t you come here more often? Man, I’d be coming here all the time. Great food, great scenery, painful life lessons.” She sent a mischievous smile to the Shaman. “You know I think that part was pretty great, right?”

He smiled back. “Yes, I know.”

“I mean, not that I want to do that every time I come. That could get old.”

“Indeed.”

“Every now and then might not be too bad. I could probably use it every now and then.” She looked at Giles. “So, why don’t you come here all the time?”

Giles rolled his eyes. “Well, let me see. It might have something to do with a certain Slayer for whom I have responsibility.”

She poked him on the arm. “Yeah, but if I’m here with you, you won’t need to worry about what I’m doing.” He could hardly argue with that. Giles just kept eating his ice cream. Suddenly Buffy put down her fork and looked at him again. “I know what I keep forgetting to ask you. That big hairy fur ball. That tiger. Is he one of your spirit guides?”

Giles grinned, nodding. “Yes, he is.”

“Did you know I have one too? A spirit guide of my very own?” Giles shook his head, amusement in his eyes at Buffy’s excitement. Buffy continued. “Remember that mountain lion, the one in the desert?”

“Yes, the one you referred to as the nice kitty cat?”

“Yeah, that one. Anyway, that’s her. She’s my spirit guide. Her name’s Seeker.” Buffy waved her fork in the air. “And you know where my secret garden is?”

Giles shook his head again.

“The library, the library at the high school.” She sighed. “I loved that place.”

Giles smiled at her. “So did I. We met there, you and I.”

Buffy grinned. “Who’d have guessed when you threw that Vampyr book at me that three years later we’d blow the place up, and two years after that we’d be here, in Brigadoon?” Buffy pushed her now empty plate away and sent a plaintive look towards the Shaman and the ice cream container. He immediately filled a bowl for her, and then put the container away.

Giles smiled at Buffy and in a Scottish brogue, he spoke to her. “Will ye go gather some wild heather on the morrow then, lassie?”

Buffy sent him a delighted look. “Only if you go with me.”

Giles nodded. “That I will.” He reached forward and tucked a strand of her hair behind one of her ears. Then he frowned. “And I hardly threw that book at you, Buffy.”

Buffy just laughed and dug into her ice cream.

***

Giles escorted Buffy back to her room. He followed in behind her at Buffy’s invitation because every one of the guest suites here at his friend’s estate was a work of art, and he’d never been in this one. At least that’s what he told himself. Giles walked around the suite, admiring the antiques and the tranquil aesthetics and he did everything he could to avoid eye contact with the bed.

Giles ended up standing by the window, which faced an inner courtyard. Buffy moved to stand by his side. She pressed her face close to the glass. “So, are there like parts of that Sri Lanka place right under us? Are there people shopping and eating, and you know, doing Indian stuff, right here? But we can’t see them and they can’t see us?”

Giles watched as the moonlight reflected on her hair and he reached up a hand to touch it, to run his fingers through it but he pulled back at the last second. He focused on her question. “I’m not completely sure. I believe that we are in a time-space bubble, sort of a temporal displacement.”

Buffy turned to look at him, her face scrunched up. “What? A whatty what?”

He tried again. “It’s as if once you walk in the door that you actually get taken away to someplace different, someplace not truly here. It’s sort of a physics conundrum, rather difficult to explain.”

Buffy didn’t understand anything he was saying but she took a step closer to him and started to grin. “I love it when you do that.”

Giles looked at her, a bit confused. “When I do what?”

She took another step closer, until only inches separated them. “Talk all smart. It’s so…” She blushed and turned her head away, her momentary courage, her plans to kiss him, fleeing in a rush of shyness.

Giles reached out and caught her chin, turning her face back to his. “It’s so…what?” She shook her head, blushing again, her eyes not meeting his. Giles stared down at her, pulling on all his Buffy reading skills to try and interpret her behavior. He was finding it a challenge to find the level playing field on this, as she had put it, new terrain they suddenly seemed to be in. He decided to take a gamble. “In this future of yours, the one where you and I…”

She looked up at him then and he caught the quick expression of relief on her face. He understood then. It was his turn. She schooled her face into one of interest. “Yes?”

Giles bit back a grin. “You said you could tell what I was feeling and thinking.” Buffy nodded; Giles continued. “You said that I looked up and saw something in your eyes. What was I thinking right then? What was I feeling?”

Buffy thought back to that life, to that brief moment when the future Buffy and Giles had stared at one another before they had started kissing. She looked at Giles, tried to imagine him as the one in that future but she couldn’t. He was so real, so…so right in front of her. He was standing close to her and she could feel the heat radiating off his body. The butterflies came back with a vengeance. She shook her head. “I don’t know. It all happened so fast. I…” She just stared at his face, the wonderful crinkles around his eyes, his nose, his chin, his lips.

Giles didn’t need her to tell him. He could see the look in her eyes, and he could feel what was happening to him. “Shall I try then, shall I try and tell you what I was thinking?” Buffy nodded. Giles took a step backwards and sat on the edge of the bed. He pulled Buffy down next to him. Reaching up he ran his hand lightly down the side of her face. Buffy instinctively leaned into it, like a cat, looking for more.

Giles closed his eyes for a second as desire for her swept through him. “I think that he saw your face, and he saw that you wanted him, and he couldn’t imagine that anything more wonderful had ever happened to him. I think that he looked at you and all he could think about was how beautiful you were…”

Buffy leaned in to kiss him but Giles met her halfway and in moments Giles had laid her back on the bed and he was lying half on top of her, their mouths fused in a passionate kiss. One of his hands was fisted in her hair; the other was pulling her as close to him as he could, needing to feel her pressed against him.

Buffy moaned and as she touched her tongue to his, so many emotions were running through her. Rampant relief that it was actually happening, deep satisfaction that this time, it was real, it was her, a coiling possessiveness that made her want to brand him for all time as hers, and a glorious sensual response to his touch that made her crave for more. She pulled away for a second and held his face with her hands. “It’s happening just like last time, you laying me down, you lying on me.”

Giles turned his head and kissed one of her palms. “I can’t believe how much I want you.” He could hardly breath. Sanity reared its head for a second. “Should I stop? Am I moving too fast?”

Buffy clutched at him. “Don’t you dare stop. And don’t worry about moving too fast. We were married. A part of me remembers having sex with you, a lot.”

Giles responded by kissing her again. Then he started thinking again. He pulled his head back. “Are you sure you want this Buffy?”

“Shut up, Giles.” She started trying to pull his sweater off.

Giles put out a hand to stop her, wanting to look at her face again. He stared at her for a moment and shook his head, amazed. “You really do want this, don’t you?”

She managed to get his sweater off. “Ever since I saw us together, ever since I saw us kissing, ever since I saw us making love, spending our lives together, it’s all I’ve wanted. All of it. You.” She ran her hand through his chest hair, her eyes raking his body and then she looked back up at Giles. Buffy grinned. “That’s the look. Right now, that look on your face. That’s the one the future you had. What are you thinking?”

“That this really is the most wonderful thing that’s ever happened to me. And that I love you.”

Buffy let out a long and happy sigh. “I remember you telling me that in the future, but it’s much better this way.” She giggled.

“What?”

“I was jealous of me.”

“Jealous…?”

Buffy nodded. “I was jealous cause she had you, cause you took her hand. I wanted to claw my eyes out.” Giles laughed, softly. He reached down and took both of her hands in his larger ones and he brought them to his lips. She looked up at him with shining eyes and let out another sigh. “I love you too.”

Giles drank her in. He thought about the journey he’d been on, how painful it had been, and yet, it had led him here to her, to his heart, and to a future he’d never even allowed himself to believe in. Giles felt a blinding flash of gratitude that shook him in its intensity. He bowed his head for a moment and sent out a prayer of gratefulness to all his spirit guides and teachers, thanking them for every lesson, every moment of guidance that had brought him to this moment.

Buffy watched him, and waited until he lifted his eyes again. “Are you all right?”

Giles smiled. “Yes. Just so damn grateful that everything…that my journey, both inside”, he tapped himself on his chest, “…and outside, that it all led me here.”

Buffy nodded. “Right here to me.” Buffy got lost for a second thinking about her own journey. She shook her head and decided she could wax philosophical tomorrow. She captured his gaze again. “Hey, you gonna kiss me now?”

Giles grinned. “Yes.” And taking her in his arms he claimed her as his and together they started building their own future.

The End
December 5, 2001

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