Title: The Assistant 3/?
Author: Sweetdoggie
Disclaimer: No permission has been granted to use the characters. They are owned by their creator, Joss Whedon, Twentieth Century Fox, UPN, WB, and Mutant Enemy. This story is non-profit and is intended solely as entertainment. No copyright infringement is intended.

“Buffy, we need to patrol this evening.” Giles insisted for what had to be the fourth time.

“Giles, I don’t want to patrol. I want to go on a date. Probably you remember what that is, right? You know, when a guy asks a girl out and they spend time together, sometimes involving food and/or a movie, but definitely not involving strolling around a cemetery and staking undead things?”

He sighed. It wasn’t just that they really did need to patrol, it was also the fact that he didn’t want Buffy dating anyone but himself. He had already warned off that pillock, Angel, and told him that if he wished to continue walking the earth, he would desist from his attempts at attracting the Slayer’s interest. Surprisingly, the vampire had listened. Perhaps it was the rather large stake that Giles had been carrying that had turned the tide. The Watcher didn’t know or care as long as he stayed away from Buffy. Now his darling girl wanted to date this high school pup.

“Buffy, you know I don’t deliberately wish to spoil your fun, but there is a rumor of suspicious vampire activity and we have the prophecy about the Anointed One. I really feel that we should put every effort into investigating this and Merrick agrees with me.” He hated having to bring the other Watcher into it, but his name usually worked magic on the Slayer and caused her to become slightly less intractable. “I’ll buy you an ice cream after, if you wish.” He bribed.

She sighed. “OK. You win. But it better be the really good kind of ice cream, not the cheap stuff.”

“For you, only the best.” He told her with a smile.

They patrolled the length and breadth of the town together, staking six vampires between them. “You know,” Buffy mentioned as they strolled along, “you really are pretty good at this whole fighting thing…I mean, especially for a human.”

“Thank you for the lovely compliment, Buffy, but I would like to point out that you are human too.” Giles said, torn.

“Am I?” She asked him curiously. “I thought I was, but that was back in the days before I could bench press a car. How do you know the Slayer is human once they’re Called?”

“Well, the Calling is magic. It does not affect your status as part of humanity. If you like, you can think of yourself as a human with add ons. On the most basic biological level, you are human. You can inter-breed with other humans and produce viable offspring, should you choose.”

Buffy wrinkled her nose at the thought of children and shrugged. It wasn’t going to be an issue in her life anyway. She would never live long enough to have babies. She sighed again. “Would my children be Slayers?”

“They would have a greater likelihood, I suppose, than the general population. These things tend to run in families.” He told her.

“So, how come my mom isn’t a Slayer?” Buffy asked.

“The Council has investigated this rather closely. Apparently, several hundred years ago, a Slayer gave birth to a child and adopted it out. The Council lost track of the family for a while, but they believe you are the direct descendant of that Slayer. These things can skip many generations, until the conditions to call the Slayer are perfect. It’s possible that your mother did have the potential, but she might have been too old or too young when the call was issued and thus missed her cue.”

“So there’s age limits on this?” She asked him curiously.

“So far as we know, no Slayer is called before puberty and none after the age of eighteen. We don’t really know why except that a child simply wouldn’t have the strength or emotional endurance to survive and once past eighteen, the girl might not have the adaptability to learn to fight.” He shrugged. “It’s all guess work, I suppose.”

Buffy nodded. “It makes sense.” She looked up at him with a grin. “How about that ice cream, Watcher-mine?”

He grinned at her appellation. “Ice cream, it is.”

They walked three blocks to the 24-hour ice cream parlor and he held the door while she entered. Buffy chose Praline Caramel Delight and Giles had Black Forrest Walnut. Buffy offered him a lick off her cone. “Want to try mine?” She asked him.

“I, I suppose that would be all right.” He said and leaned over for a taste. He offered her his cone. “W, would you like to taste me, mine, I mean.” He blushed furiously as this Freudian slip.

She gave him a sideways look but leaned over and ran her tongue up his cone. “Hmmm. I’m going to have to remember that flavor.” She told him. “It’s really good.”

“Yes.” He practically gasped, desperately aroused by the sight of her pink tongue licking the ice cream out of his hand.

“You OK?” She said, looking concerned.

“Er, ice cream headache.” He told her.

“Oooo. I hate those. If you scrunch your eyebrows together really hard it helps.” She offered.

He practiced the prescribed remedy and was surprised when it did help. “Thank you. I’ll keep that remedy in mind next time we eat this.” He told her.

She smiled at him. “You know, this might not have been the date I wanted, but it was pretty good anyway.”

He swore his heart skipped a beat at her words, but he responded with a calm, “ Yes, it was rather enjoyable,” and let it drop.

They chatted for nearly an hour before Buffy said she needed to get home. “Mom has taken to coming into my room at all hours. If she finds I’m gone, I’ll get into mondo trouble.”

Giles looked concerned. “I’ll talk to Merrick. There must be something we can do to make your mother be less restrictive of your actions.”

Buffy shrugged. “That would be great, but I’m not looking for it to happen anytime soon. I’m afraid she’s going to find out about the Slayer stuff and then my behind will really be in a sling!”

“Er, yes.” He agreed. She really was a colorful girl.

They walked back to the Watcher’s house where Buffy left him with a wave after seeing him safely inside. She ran all the way home, climbed into her bedroom window and carefully pulled off her slaying clothes to get ready for bed. Quickly tucking herself into her jammies, she heard her mother creeping down the hall toward her room. She dived under the quilt and pulled the blankets up to her waist, rolling on her stomach to hide her face from her mother.

Joyce quietly opened the door to her daughter’s room and was deeply relieved to see her in bed asleep. She knew that Buffy slipped out sometimes at night and assumed it was to see a boy. Joyce remembered what it had felt like to be a teenager in love and tried not to go into her Nazi parent mode, but sometimes she just couldn’t help it. Buffy was too young to be meeting boys clandestinely. She thought Buffy might be running with a gang. Sometimes her clothes were torn or bloody and there was no reasonable explanation for it. She never mentioned these anomalies to her daughter because she didn’t want to be lied to and had a feeling that Buffy would manufacture a story simply to appease her. Her baby was growing up and it wasn’t in a direction that Joyce was comfortable with.

She didn’t like the constant references to the school librarian, Mr. Giles or his housemate, Mr. Merrick. Joyce knew it was good that Buffy had some interest in school even if it was limited to the gay librarian and his partner. The men seemed to care about her and constantly helped her with her homework. Joyce had noticed her grades were improving since she met them, but it still concerned her. She made up her mind to meet Mr. Giles and if she could finagle it, his housemate as well. With the situation resolved somewhat in her mind; she went off to bed with a clear conscience.

When Buffy got up the next morning, her mother was in the kitchen fixing breakfast, something not often seen in the Summers’ household. “Hi mom! What’s up with the breakfast fest?” Buffy asked her bouncing into the kitchen in a very good humor.

“Oh, I just felt like it this morning.” Joyce looked at her daughter with a smile. “I’ve decided that I’m going to drive over to the school this morning and meet your Mr. Giles. I want to thank him for taking you under his wing.”

Buffy knew better than to show any reaction. “OK. I hope you like him as much as I do. He is such a good explainer. I actually understand stuff when he tells it to me. And he’s not totally boring either.” Buffy stuffed a piece of toast into her mouth.

Buffy’s calm acceptance of Joyce’s plan surprised her. Maybe there was really nothing untoward going on after all, she thought with relief. “So, is there any chance of meeting his housemate, Mr. Merrick? You always talk about them together so I just wondered if I could meet him as well. I’d like to thank him for taking so much time with you when it’s not even his job.”

Buffy shrugged. “Mr. Merrick might be around. He hasn’t been feeling good for quite a while, so I don’t know if he’ll be able to visit today or not. He’s a real nice guy. I owe him a lot.”

Once again, Buffy’s unconcern pleased Joyce. “So, uhm, Mr. Giles and Mr. Merrick? Have they been, uhm, together very long?” She probed.

“I think Mr. Merrick knew Mr. Giles back in England.” Buffy said, carefully fostering the impression her mother had that both men were gay. Merrick had warned her that this was the plan. She had laughed herself nearly sick when he told her.

“Please! Don’t make me laugh anymore! You guys could have any woman on the planet and you expect people to believe you’re gay?” She shook her head. “Half the girls at school have crushes on Giles and another forty percent or so think you are pretty hot, Merrick!” She chuckled again and leaned forward. “Don’t tell Giles this, but I think he’s kinda cute too.”

Merrick had smiled. “Rupert is definitely heterosexual in orientation, Buffy, as am I myself. We simply thought it would be an easy and expeditious way to explain our living arrangements as well as to remove undo suspicion from our frequent rendezvous with you.”

“Good cover!” She grinned, leaning up to give him a huge hug and to kiss his cheek fondly. “I love you, Merrick.” She had danced away and continued her practice under the older man’s tutelage.

Giles had come in to the room in time to see the hug and kiss and to hear her declaration of love. He was almost blindly jealous even though he knew that he and Buffy had not built the rapport that she and Merrick had. He resolved to work on it. Someday she would say those words to him and he wanted to be worthy of her regard.

Buffy’s attention snapped back to her mother. “Well, I gotta run, mom. I promised I’d help pick up the library this morning if Mr. Giles helped me with that English paper.” She kissed her mother on the cheek and grabbed her book bag, running all the way to school.

She had fifteen minutes to spare before her first class and raced to find Giles and Merrick sitting in his office reading books on vampires. They looked up as she barged into the room, panting slightly. “Mom is coming today to meet you both. I said I was here to help clean up the library because Giles helped me with my English paper. She thinks you’re gay. I said you knew each other in England. I gotta go.” She hurriedly left the room, then raced back. “Just wanted to say thanks, I love you guys to pieces.” She left again, not wanting to be late for her class.

Giles looked at Merrick. “There is no way on this earth, that I am going to feign a romantic affection for you, John.”

The older man laughed. “Nor I for you, Rupert. Perhaps we won’t need to. After all, the woman is dedicated to seeing only that which she wants to see. Look at how persistently she has been able to ignore our Buffy’s calling.”

Giles nodded in agreement. Mrs. Summer’s ignorance of her daughter’s real life was almost ludicrous. He turned to the older man. “Why didn’t you remove her from her family like a normal Slayer?”

Merrick looked up, surprised at the question. “She was much too old, I’m afraid. She would have missed her parents too deeply and it would have damaged her training as the Slayer. Besides, we were needed in LA and her parents basically ignored her anyway. It wasn’t much of a hardship to leave her with them.”

“You could have wiped her memory of her parents.” Giles said. “You certainly know enough magic to do so without damaging her.”

“Yes, I could have done that.” Merrick admitted. “And, I must say, it did cross my mind. However, after spending ten minutes in Buffy’s company, I decided that it would be a huge loss to the world for her to be tampered with in any way. She’s a very sweet but difficult girl, and both parts are what make her an excellent Slayer.” Merrick looked at the younger Watcher.

“Did you know that her parents put her in a mental health clinic when she tried to tell them about vampires and her secret life? They said she was using drugs to enhance her strength and simply refused to believe her no matter what. She quickly learned the value of silence and has vowed that her parents will never find out about her life.”

Giles was appalled. “Good Heavens, John. What were they thinking of? Buffy is the most resoundingly sane person I have ever met. You couldn’t find someone more grounded than she.”

Merrick agreed. “Yes, but her parents are civilians. I suppose it’s a natural, if ignorant reaction.” He shook his head. “I try not to be too horrified, but some of the things Buffy has revealed casually make me want to throttle her parents for their blindness. She loves them both deeply and they have hurt her time and again with their preoccupation and exclusion of her from their lives.”

Less than an hour after this discussion, Joyce Summers walked into the Sunnydale High School Library. She looked around, unable to see the attraction that the place held for her daughter. It was dark and smelled of musty books. Whatever it was, it certainly wasn’t the sort of place she expected her daughter to find comforting. A male head poked out of an office when she opened the door.

“Yes? May I be of some assistance?” Giles asked her, guessing her to be Buffy’s mother from the strong family resemblance he detected between them.

“Hello. I’m Joyce Summers. Buffy’s mother?” She introduced herself holding out her hand to be shaken.

Giles took her hand and shook it limply, doing his best to look gay, though he really had no idea if this were successful or not. “How do you d, do? I, I, I’m Rupert Giles, the school Librarian. B, B, Buffy speaks of you often.” He nodded jerkily, his Adam’s apple bobbing like it had a mind of its own.

Joyce felt better just meeting this shy man. Clearly, he was no threat to Buffy. She asked to be shown around the library. Giles gave her a tour. “Buffy speaks about you and a Mr. Merrick all the time. I just thought I would come meet the people that are making such an impression on my daughter.” She told him with a smile.

“W, w, would you like to m, m, meet John? He’s r, reading in the office.” Giles tapped on the door, opened it and muttered something that she couldn’t hear. Seconds later an older man emerged. He was handsome, but had obviously been quite ill. His face was heavily lined and he didn’t smile as he shook her hand. Giles used the opportunity to step away from them and begin shelving books.

“So, you’re a friend of Buffy’s as well.” Joyce said.

“Yes.” Merrick nodded. “Buffy is a very troubled young woman. She needs a great deal of guidance in her life. Before I retired, I spent a lot of time working with children like her. It’s a hard habit to give up. Rupert is trying, but he’s quite young and doesn’t yet have the experience necessary to completely guide a strong girl like your daughter.”

Joyce nodded; never having thought of Buffy as a strong girl, the concept threw her off balance. “Uh, Buffy mentioned that you had known Mr. Giles back in England?”

He nodded shortly. “Yes. I lived in England for many years. I’ve known Rupert since he was fifteen.”

“Oh.” Joyce said. Her mind was screaming ‘eeeuw!’ at the thought of a romance between this old man and a fifteen-year-old boy.

“Rupert was a troubled youth. It’s part of the reason he’s so good with young people himself. He knows what its like to be different.” Merrick nodded again. “He’s a very good man and your daughter couldn’t be in better hands. She’s starting to respond to him, you know. Her grades have picked up and she seems to be doing her homework.”

“Yes. That is good.” Joyce said. “I’ve tried everything I could think of to keep Buffy on track but its very hard.” She hesitated. “There was some…unpleasantness back at her old school. She hung out with a rough crowd and got into quite a bit of trouble.” Joyce laughed lightly but couldn’t quite carry it off. “I sent her for counseling, you know. She was taking some sort of drug that made her delusional. She tried to convince my husband and myself that vampires were real and that her purpose was to slay them.” She laughed again. “I’d really appreciate it if you could sort of keep an eye on her and let me know if you notice any sort of behavior like that. Do you know, one day I came home and found an entire box of stuff like wooden stakes, crosses, and holy water under her bed? Of course, I made her get rid of it, but still.”

“Oh? How did you come to find this, uh, paraphernalia?” He asked quietly.

“Well, I was searching her room for drugs. She’d been missing a lot of school, not sleeping well, always tired-looking. It was just like back in LA. I was afraid it was starting again.” She confided to the older man.

He rubbed his chin as he contemplated the mother of his Slayer. He wanted to shake her till her teeth rattled for her constant harassment of Buffy. He had given the Slayer a locking trunk to keep her supplies in after that incident. “I think, Mrs. Summers, that perhaps you ought to give Buffy some room. I know it’s hard to see her growing up and away from you, but at some point you have to learn to trust her. Just let me know if you see any problem behaviors and I will be more than happy to talk to Buffy. Sometimes an outsider is easier to talk to than family.” He pointed out.

Joyce smiled. “Yes, thank you so much. You and Mr. Giles are doing an excellent job with her.” She turned to leave but called to Giles as she went. “Thank you, Mr. Giles. I see that Buffy is in good hands with you two.”

He forced a smile. If she had the slightest idea of his attraction to her daughter she’d have the police on his doorstep before an hour had passed. “T, thank you, Mrs. S, S, Summers. We shall endeavor to give Buffy the absolute best care possible. She is a wonderful girl and we care very deeply about her.”

The two men waited until she had left the building before turning to each other. “Harridan!” Merrick told the Librarian. “She told me that she’d been searching Buffy’s room for drugs again.”

“Poor Buffy.” Giles said, stutter completely gone.

“Yes, the woman is blind as a bat, Rupert. I actually lived in her house in LA for weeks at a time and she never noticed me. She met me, for heaven’s sake! I wonder if all the parents of Slayers are this oblivious? Could it be an arrangement from the Powers that Be, do you suppose?”

Giles laughed and shrugged. “Was her father that bad?”

“Worse in his own way. He was having an affair and his family had ceased to mean anything real to him. He purports to love Buffy, but how many times has he actually contacted her since we’ve moved to Sunnydale?” Merrick snorted. “Our girl’s parents have neglected her, my boy.”

“So, we are going with the gay theory then?” Giles asked with a slight groan.

“I’m afraid we must. I told that woman that we had known each other since you were fifteen. I’m very much afraid she thought I was a child molester.” Merrick looked satisfied. “She won’t think we’re after her daughter sexually, at least.”

Several hours later Buffy breezed into the Library once again. “Hey! It’s me! Anybody here?” She called.

Merrick stuck his head out of the office. “Rupert has gone to procure lunch for us, and you are welcome to join us, dear girl.”

She threw her book bag down near the table and pulled up a chair. “Thanks, I might do that. They’re having that brown stuff in the cafeteria again.” She sighed. “It ought to be slayed! So, how did momfest go this morning?”

“Not too badly, I suppose. She definitely thinks we are gay. I told her I counseled troubled children before I retired and that’s the reason I enjoy working with you. She mentioned searching your room for drugs. Why didn’t you tell Rupert or myself that was going on again?”

Buffy looked down. “I didn’t want you to think badly about me. I mean, my own mom doesn’t trust me.”

Merrick patted her shoulder comfortingly. He longed to take her in his arms, but that sort of comfort now belonged to Rupert and he would not overstep. “Buffy, there is no way on earth I would ever think badly of you. Your mother simply doesn’t understand. She doesn’t know you like Rupert and I do.” He hesitated. “Have you ever thought about not living with your mother? It’s not really the way of the Slayer, you know. Would you rather live with Rupert and myself?”

She looked at one of the two most important people in her life. “Merrick, I love you so much, and I love Rupert too, even if he is a little weird. But I love my mom too. Even supposing legally that you could get me away from her, I wouldn’t want to hurt her like that. And she’s not always drug-tracking mom. Sometimes we sit down and eat a pizza together and watch old movies, or go shopping together, or talk about boys—I need that sort of thing, Merrick. I need just a little bit of normal in my crazy life, if you see what I mean.”

He patted her shoulder again. “Just remember that the option is open, dear. We could wipe Joyce’s memory; fix it so she would think it was perfectly natural to have you raised by two strange men. I simply want you to know that if things ever become too tense, you have a home with Rupert and myself.”

She leaned up and kissed his cheek just as Giles walked into the room carrying take out. “Oh, I say! What’s going on here, then? Are you all right, Buffy?”

She smiled at him. “I’m great, Giles. How could I not be great with two such wonderful men watching out for me?” She walked over to him, helped him set the food on the table and gave him a huge hug. “Thank you, Rupert Giles.” She kissed his cheek as well.

He blushed like a schoolboy. “You are entirely welcome, Buffy. But I should like to know what I’m being thanked for?”

“Just for being there.” She told him. “Merrick said I could eat with you guys if you don’t mind?”

He smiled and pulled out an extra plate. They dished up the Chinese food and between the three of them, polished it off quite nicely. While Buffy was still there, he told Rupert about offering to have her live with them. Giles nodded enthusiastically. “Of course, Buffy. If you decide that you wish to go that route, we can arrange things. Never think we wouldn’t want you to be with us, because that is simply not true.”

Buffy smiled and thanked both men again before leaving for her next class. Giles and Merrick cleaned up the remains of the meal and sat down to talk about the events of the day. “So you offered to alter her mother’s memory?” Giles asked. “I’m rather surprised, actually.”

Merrick looked vaguely uncomfortable. “I didn’t actually offer, I merely told her it could be done should she desire it.”

Giles snorted. “Splitting hairs, old boy? You know you’d turn the mother into a toad if Buffy wanted it.”

Merrick grinned unrepentant. “Like you wouldn’t?”

Giles returned the grin and admitted: “In a heartbeat.”

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