Title- Admissions 7/7
Author- Veronica
Rating- g
Pairing- G/W
Disclaimer- all Joss's
Feedback- last chapter in this fic... big big yes
Summery- discovering love and growth
Giles was floored by her admission of love, and just sat in stunned silence. He felt like such an idiot as nothing came to mind. 'Years? Did she say Years?' he thought as he looked into the face of the red haired beauty who was patiently awaiting his response. When none was forthcoming, she seemed to whither where she sat and looked around nervously for a reason to escape.
The Watcher regained some of his lost composure, but his mind was still reeling. Doubts slammed into him as she stood, making him come to the conclusion of why she may 'think' she was in love with him.
"Willow, sit down. We need to discuss this rationally. Now there's no delicate way to put this, but I believe you are going through what is called 'The Florence Nightingale Syndrome'. I was the one there when you needed someone most... I assure you, it is quite common."
"Giles, you didn't listen, I said I've loved you for years: not months, years. I-I knew I shouldn't have told you, but if I was gooing to get my life going in any sort of direction, I needed to tell you and get it off my chest." she looked around, her mind racing for an excuse to get out of the house, and Giles could see the tears in her eyes, not yet falling.
"Willow," he said softly.
"I'm sorry, Giles. I-I didn't want to hurt you or make you uncomfortable, or or..." she couldn't hold back the sobs any longer, "I gotta go." she said as she ran to the front door, opened it and ran down the street before Giles could stop her.
He could feel her emotions even now. The pain, sense of loss... he broke her heart. She was telling him the truth, she loves him and had been willing to risk they're frienship to tell him.
"BLOODY HELL!"
* * * *
Willow lay in the sun warmed grass near the ephigee of Pozapexxa... the same instrument she had used while in a hate filled fog, trying to destroy the world. She told Giles what she needed to say, and waited for his response that would tell her what to do. She didn't get the answer that she'd hoped for, but she did get the answer that she'd expected. Had Giles returned her feeliing she would have a reason to stay, but as it was his reply made her choose to go to New York. She had been offered a position a year ago in a computer software firm.
Sunnydale was just too small for her now, it made her feel smothered and confined, and even though she loved her friends, she came to the conclusion that she had outgrown them.
A small bird landed on the ground a few feet away, and ever so slowly Willow sat up and held out her hand. She quietly whispered a few words and seeds appeared in her palm. She then directed her thoughts at the small creature, and within moments the bird left the ground, only to land in her hand and begin eating the food offered. Giles watched from behind a tree as she stroked the birds back with gentle fingers. He silently kicked himself for being such a coward and hiding behind a tree, and left to talk to Willow.
"Even the tiny creatures can see the kindness in your heart."
Willow jumped at the sound of his voice, which caused the bird to fly away. "I'm sorry. I did not mean to startle you."
"It's okay. No harm done." she replied, turning her head to look away. His gaze fell upon the ephigee, then back to Willow.
"Somehow, I thought I might find you here."
"I was going to lower it back into the ground, but decided that it would make a good reminder of what could happen if I was ever on the verge of losing control." she paused, "I guess that sounds sort of silly."
"A little." he said, and she turned her head and looked up into his face.
"Giles, why did you come here?"
"Actually, I came here so that we might finish our conversation. I know you were speaking the truth when you made your confession, but it was something that I had never anticipated."
"Giles, it's okay... you don't need to say any more. I do understand."
"No, you do not. I've always admired you, so eager to learn and always willing to do whatever it takes to make people happy. You've always given yourself to everyone, whole heartedly and without question, never expecting anything in return except friendship. Your intelligence has always astounded me. During all of our research sessions I knew I could count on you to understand, and translate the information into something Buffy and Xander could comprehend." he said as he looked off into the distance.
"Giles, what are you trying 'not' to say?"
"Oh... bloody hell, Willow! I'm old enough to be your father." he answered, raising his voice in frustration.
"Giles... Rupert, look at me." she said as she stood up and faced him, "Do I look like someone who still sleeps in a crib? I'm not the same little girl you first met anymore."
"No," he sighed, " no your not." he raised a hand and softly carressed her cheek with the back of his fingers. "You have the most enchanting eyes I have ever seen, and your smile fills my heart with a warmth that I haven't felt in years." he leaned in and placed his lips upon hers in a kiss filled with such tenderness, and it filled him with joy to feel her return his kiss. The love she felt flowed through him, and he slowly pulled away to gaze into her deep green eyes. "I have an admission of my own to make. I do understand how you feel, Willow. For I, too, am in love with you."
the end
ADMISSIONS OF GUILT (Sequel)