Title: B & B Weekend 3-4
Author: Gileswench
Contact: gileswench@yahoo.com
Feedback: Constructive criticism always welcome. Praise abjectly sought.
Disclaimer: It all belongs to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc., etc., etc. I just let them have all the fun Joss won't. I own nothing except my twisted mind which you really don't want. Please don't sue.



"Wakey, wakey Giles." Buffy crooned to her unconscious bedmate. "Time for breakfast."

"Not just yet, Mum. I don't want to go to school."

"Big faker! I know you're awake."

"Am not." The effect was spoiled by his twitching lips.

"Are too. Now you have to get up."

"Already have done, luv." He moved her hand to demonstrate the truth of his statement.

"Great. I'm in love with the worlds' biggest sex fiend." she giggled.

"I didn't hear any complaints last night."

"True. But now it's morning and I'm hungry.

"So am I." He rolled on top of Buffy, kissing her deeply.

"What am I going to do with you? Don't answer that. C'mon, Giles, I need to eat. We can have sex again later."

"I'm holding you to that promise, you realize."

"That's the kind of promise I like to keep. And just so you know I'm serious, here's something to hold you till then." She kissed him passionately, their tongues mingling sensuously. "So can we go eat now?"

"I rather think I need a shower first."

"Great, I'll join you."

"Buffy, if you actually want breakfast, I suggest you let me do this on my own. Later, however, I think we might enjoy a bubble bath together."

"You're on!"

*****

"Mmphh...What time is it?"

"Eight A.M. Time to get up."

"When did we get to sleep?'

"I've no idea. Oddly enough I didn't check the clock to see what precise time I dropped off."

"Are you always this grouchy in the morning?"

"Only on those mornings when I wake in a chair after spending half the night listening to a very loudly affectionate couple in the next room. It tends to lead to a crick in my neck, a sore back, and...well, we needn't go into that. Suffice to say, I look forward to the end of this assignment."

"I get the shower first. I'll leave you some hot water."

"That won't be necessary."

*****

Buffy and Giles were the first into the dining room for breakfast. They were greeted by Chip.

"Good morning, you two. Well, I thought you'd sleep in a little more than that, but Betty knew you'd want breakfast on the early side."

"I'm usually up before this, having my morning jog. But since we're on holiday..."

"Well, I guess you got your exercise last night, eh?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"It was the first time for the two of you, wasn't it?"

Buffy and Giles looked in horror at one another. Then they both looked studiously at the floor, blushing furiously.

"I really don't see how that's any of your business."

They were saved further embarrassment by a shout from the kitchen.

"Chip! Come get the plates."

He ambled off, giving the lovers a wink and a grin as he left.

"Well that was a great way to start the day. Do you think everyone heard us last night?"

"I don't know about the rest of the house, but those of us in the next room heard you loud and clear all night long. Do you think you could try being a little quieter tonight? I'd like to get some sleep after last nights' Kama Sutra-thon."

"Cordelia? Oh my god, what are you doing here? The next room? You were in the next room?"

Giles whipped his glasses off and began to massage the bridge of his nose.

"Bloody hell."

"I came up here because the PTB sent me a migraine-gram that you two were in trouble, and instead I find you're just discovering the joy of hormones. And have either of you seen a purpley demon?"

"What in the name of all that's holy is or are the "PTB"?"

"Powers That Be. And I'll have you know that Angel insisted that Wesley come along with me..."

"Wesley is here?" Buffy squeaked. "This can't get any worse."

Giles and Cordelia glared at her.

"I just kinda guaranteed it's gonna get worse, didn't I?"

"I'm certain everything will be all right, Buffy." Giles placed his hands comfortingly on the girls' shoulders, but sounded as though he were trying to convince himself. Just then, Chip returned with the breakfast plates for both couples.

"Now where is your young man, Miss Chase? I'm sure you two will settle your differences while you're here. This place has that effect on people."

With that, Chip scurried back to the kitchen.

"Is it just me, or does that guy creep you out too?"

"He is somewhat...unsettling, I agree, Buffy."

"Can I slay him? Please?"

"May."

"May I slay him? I'll make it worth your while."

"No you may not. At least not until he has shown himself to be something worse than annoying."

"You never let me have any fun."

"Then what was all that racket last night?"

Wesley appeared in the doorway before that conversation could be started again. Despite his determinedly cheerful demeanor, he failed to meet anyones' eyes.

"Good morning all. Did everyone get a good nights' sleep?'

"Give it up, Wes. Cordy already told us. Sorry."

"Yes, we really had no idea. We'll try to be more thoughtful tonight."

All four sat down to the delicious breakfast that awaited them, and tried to keep the conversation on general topics that would not lead to embarrassment. Soon a feminine giggle in the hall announced the arrival of another couple.

The young man was tall and blonde; the girl, a mid-size redhead. They looked for all the world as if nobody else existed. Until, that is, the young man saw who was sitting at the table.

"Buffy?"

"Riley? What are you doing here?"

"Hello, Riley."

"Mr. Giles?"

The young man quickly regained his composure.

"It looks like we have a few introductions to make. Buffy Summers, Mr. Giles, this is Katie. Katie Lewis."

"Katie Lewis Finn!"

"Sorry, still getting used to that. We uh, we got married yesterday."

"Married? You got married?"

"Well, may we be the first to congratulate you both. We hope you will have a long and happy life together, don't we, Buffy?" He raised his eyebrow for emphasis.

"Uh, yeah. I hope you and Katie will be as happy as Rupert and I are, don't we, Sweetie?" She took his arm in a possessive grip.

"Yes, well, oh, and may I introduce Cordelia Chase and Wesley Wyndham- Pryce. Riley was in one of Buffy's classes at university last year."

"TA, actually. Buffy...are you and Mr. Giles..."

"Together? Yup. And happy. As clams. Not married, but then, we haven't been together very long. So, Katie, when did you meet Riley?"

"We've known each other forever. We were even High School sweethearts, but we went in different directions after that. I was heartbroken when he joined up."

"Yeah, well, you went off to that all-girl college."

"Anyway, we both came back to Iowa over the summer, and we met up again, and here we are!"

"Wow. That's just...great." Buffy managed.

"What are you doing now, Riley? Th - that is when you're not getting married?" Giles had no idea what Buffy was up to, but he knew he had to find a way to defuse the situation.

"I can't really talk about it. Government work. Top Secret."

"I see. And Katie? Have you a career as well?"

"Sure do. I take care of Riley."

"How Donna Reed of you."

"Perhaps, Buffy, If you've quite finished your breakfast, we might move on to other plans for the day. I thought a walk by the lake might be pleasant. If you'll all excuse us?"

He dragged the reluctant Slayer by the arm until they got to the edge of the lake.

"Now, Buffy, would you care to explain your performance in there?"

The girl stared stubbornly at the ground and dug into the mud with the toe of her sneaker.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Your behavior toward Riley and his new wife was terribly rude and childish in the extreme."

"So?"

"Is that all you have to say for yourself?"

"How could he get married so fast? We broke up in July and he's all hitched up in October. To little miss I'm So Old Fashioned, no less. How could he do that?"

Giles sat on a boulder and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Well, now I know where I stand."

"What are you talking about? This has nothing to do with you."

"Really? I should have thought it had a great deal to do with me. I am, after all, merely your substitute for Riley."

"Giles! You're not a substitute for anyone. How can you say that after last night?"

"How can I? How can you say that after the jealous fit you threw at the breakfast table? It was perfectly clear who you'd rather be with."

"Giles, I love you." Her lip trembled as she said the words.

"I truly believed you when you said that last night - and this morning. I'm not certain I can now." He refused to look at her.

Buffy burst into tears and ran back toward the inn. Giles remained seated on his rock, staring miserably at the ground.

"Nicely done, Ripper. Do you usually find cruelty an effective technique for captivating the fair sex?"

"Ethan. What the hell are you doing here?"

"Apparently having a far better time than you are. I should have known you'd find a way to drive your little Slayer away once you'd finally gotten her into bed. You did get her into bed first, didn't you?"

"Please leave before I do something which, while I will not in the slightest regret it, may lead to a lengthy prison term."

"Sorry to disappoint, Old Son, but I'm your fellow guest for the weekend. My companion would never forgive me if I left now." He grinned unrepentantly.

"I'm astonished you convinced someone to spend that much time with you."

"She's an old friend."

"So you met her in the bar you were in night before last, did you?"

"Ripper, you cut me to the quick. I've known her for years, actually. She's recovering from a rather unpleasant break up. Some fellow who broke her heart for the sake of a girl less than half his age as I understand it."

"Piss off, Ethan."

"Tsk, tsk, language. Look, I don't know why I should bother when you're being such a bastard, but I'm going to give you some advice on dealing with women."

"Check for cold sores before asking for their phone numbers?"

"Useful tip, but not really what I had in mind. Talk to her, you burk. Stop being so defensive and let her tell you what's going on in that pretty little head."

"Why do you care if Buffy and I are involved at all, let alone whether we break up?"

"Let's just say that, for the moment, I have a vested interest in seeing that you're off the market. And I swear I haven't done anything to hurt either one of you...this time. You're doing far too good a job of it yourself anyway."

"If you've any sense of self-preservation, you'll stay out of my and Buffys' way this weekend." Giles stood to leave. After a few steps, he turned and faced Ethan. "Give my regards to Olivia, will you." With that, he stalked away.

*****

Buffy sat on a bench in the rose garden, hoping nobody else would walk by. She didn't want to be seen, and needed time to think. Once she had cried herself out, she began to replay the scene with Riley in her head and came to the startling conclusion that she had behaved like a jealous bitch. No wonder Giles felt so insecure.

Realizing that she had done something stupid, however, did not solve the problem. For that, she would have to get Giles talking.and how to accomplish that task was beyond her imagination. She could probably tie him up long enough to talk to him, but that wouldn't leave him in the mood to listen to apologies. Besides, she wasn't sure he would let her get close enough to do the job.

After an hour of contemplation, the only conclusion she had reached was that love really bites. Somehow, that didn't solve her problem. She had just decided the best thing to do was go to their room and wait for Giles to show up when she heard someone approaching.

"May I join you?"

"Giles!" She quickly wiped away the tears with the back of her hand before facing him.

Hearing no objection, Giles sat next to the girl, but stared at the ground afraid to meet her eyes.

"Buffy..." he began.

"No. Wait. Me first." She paused to take a deep breath. "I don't know what got into me, but I was a total bitch queen in there. I just...Riley...ooohh! I don't know what I mean." Buffy began to pace in frustration. "All I know is I don't want to be with him and I don't care how many women he marries because you're the man I love. I guess there's just this little morally challenged part of me that doesn't want to see any guy I've dated be happy with anyone else. It's like...I don't think any guy could really love me so if they move on it's because they never really cared in the first place, and I am so mentally challenged I can't believe it. You'd think I'd know how to deal with abandonment issues after Dad, and the Angel/Angelus thing, and Parker, and everything, but I'm not that mature. So...give me another chance to prove you're it for me?"

Giles stood and placed his hands on Buffys' shoulders to stop her.

"Actually, I think it's up to you to give me another chance. What I said to you earlier was unforgivable. It was insensitive and cruel. I'm afraid I let my own personal demons determine how I dealt with yours."

"Demons?"

"Not literal demons, Buffy; metaphorical ones." He sat them down and took a deep breath. "Love has not been particularly kind to either one of us, Buffy. I know your history and should have been more thoughtful in my reactions. Once again, I acted on my insecurities and nearly destroyed something precious."

"Why should you have insecurities? You're a great guy. Not to mention way manly."

He blushed at the compliment.

"Th-thank you. And you're a wonderful woman, my dear, but that doesn't stop you from feeling that you can't be loved. It isn't rational, but the feeling, nevertheless, is there."

"So is there an Angel in your deep, dark past?"

"You might say several. Buffy, every time I have allowed myself to feel deeply for someone, it has ended in misery. I'm frightened."

"Why?"

"Because I have never in my life loved anyone so much as I do you."

"Then we're okay, 'cause I feel the same."

For a moment, they simply sat gazing into one anothers' eyes, reading all the love, all the passion they shared. Then, with a mutual smile, they leaned in to kiss.

"Giles, didn't you say something earlier about a bubble bath?"

"As a matter of fact, I believe I did mention some such idea."

"I think maybe it's time we took it."

"Feeling dirty?" he smirked.

"Absolutely filthy." she grinned.

"Then by all means, let us do so. Lay on, Macduff."

"Huh?"

"Classical culture reference, my dear."


Buffy was surprised that Giles led her to the car rather than their room.

"Okay, I don't think we can have a bubble bath in the Citroen. I know for a fact it isn't very watertight."

Giles laughed. "No, we are not going to attempt to bathe in the car. I just thought we wouldn't want to go out much this afternoon, so we're going to make a quick run to the store to pick up something for lunch. Possibly even dinner."

"You think you're going to last that long?'

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I do."

"You are so going down, mister."

"On you. As often as you'll allow."

Buffy gasped. "Giles! That was really dirty!" She giggled.

"Yes, it was rather." he grinned smugly, pulling her into a passionate embrace. As a result, neither noticed the new car pulling in next to them.

The driver got out and hurried over to them.

"Hey! You! Get away from my daughter!"

Hank pulled Giles roughly away from Buffy

"Daddy?!"

"Oh, hello again, Mr. Summers."

"What the hell were you doing, you pervert?"

"Daddy! Let Giles go!"

"And as for you, young lady, I can't believe you'd do something so stupid! Who is this guy? Do you even know him? And what are you doing here with him?"

"Mr. Summers, if I might..."

"Shut up, you! Buffy, I asked you a question."

"You asked me three, but you couldn't wait to hit my boyfriend first, could you."

"Boyfriend? How old is this guy?"

"Please, Mr. Summers, if you'll just calm down..."

"Nobody's talking to you. Buffy, I'm waiting."

"Daddy, you remember Rupert Giles. Yes, I've known him for a long time, he was the librarian at my high school, we're here for a romantic weekend getaway which has been invaded by all kinds of crappy stuff from our past lives, he is my boyfriend, and he's forty-six. Did I miss anything?"

A plaintive sound came drifting from Hank's car.

"Just a minute. I'm not through with you, young lady." He shook his finger at her in warning as he walked to his Mercedes.

"Giles, if I ever suggest going to a place like this again, please stick bamboo under my fingernails instead."

"Your wish, as always, is my command."

"All we need to really finish things off is for Ethan Rayne to show up."

"As a matter of fact, he's here. And it seems he's brought Olivia with him."

"How do you know that when I don't?'

"He witnessed our little scene down by the lake this morning."

"What's he up to?"

"Trying to keep us together so he can have Olivia to himself, it would appear. He called me names and told me I should talk to you rather than sulking. He was quite helpful, really."

"Okay, that has got to be a sign of the Apocalypse."

"I thought so myself."

At that moment, Hank Summers helped a somewhat green-faced young girl over to meet his daughter. Buffy and Giles shared a look, complete with raised eyebrows.

"Buffy, this is Crystal. Crystal, Buffy."

"Hank has told me all about you, Buffy. I hope we're going to be friends."

"Um, sure. Why wouldn't we be?"

"Hank, can we go in now? I don't feel so good."

"Sure, Honey. Buffy, we'll talk later. We're not through with this."

Hank led Crystal to the house as Buffy and Giles shared another look.

"I don't know who Crystal is, but my Spidey-sense is going off like crazy."

Giles' lips twitched as he tried in vain to repress a smile. "I think that once we find out a little more about her, your father will be left without a leg to stand on, in terms of objecting to our relationship. Come along, my dear."

He ushered Buffy into the Citroen, and drove off.

*****

"Cordelia, would you please try to concentrate? It was big, it was purple, but what else did you notice about it? Did it have horns? A tail? Six legs? Anything you can remember will be helpful."

"It was big, purpley, and demony. That's what I know about it. Oh, and it had something it liked to eat."

"Now we're getting somewhere. What was that?"

"Annoying ex-Watchers who work for vampires."

"Cordelia, that is not helping."

"I can't think anymore. I spent all night listening to the porno soundtrack next door, and all day listening to you whine."

"I am not whining" he whined. "Take a look in this book and see if you spot anything that looks like our demon. I can't help much since you won't give me a decent description."

"That's right. Give me all the hard work. Whatever Angels' paying you, it's too much."

"Thank you very much. It's certainly nice to know what you think of me."

"Y'know, I never thought I'd say this, but I wish you were more like Giles."

"Oh, in what way?"

"At least I could tell from all the noise in there last night that he's a real man. And did see Buffy this morning? Serious glowage. She actually looked like she was using a decent skin care regimen."

"So you're under the impression that I am incapable of satisfying a woman?"

"Speaking as someone who has deliberately kissed you on more than one occasion, I'd have to say 'duh'."

"That's it! I refuse to listen to any more attacks on my masculinity."

Wesley grabbed the book from Cordelia's hands, pulled her roughly to her feet, and kissed her deeply. After a stunned moment, the girl responded, opening her mouth to his invading tongue. Each seemed determined to swallow the other whole. When they had to come up for air, Cordelia whimpered at the loss of Wesley's lips on hers.

"I must apologi-mmmphhh."

Cordelia would not let Wesley go. She covered his face in kisses as she led him to the bed.

"You want to prove your masculinity? Prove it."

"Cordelia, are you quite certain?"

"If I have to listen to those two tonight without having gotten any myself, I might just have to torch the building. If you've got another volunteer, I'm willing to listen, but I think you're all I've got to work with."

"And they say romance is dead."

Wesley gave a mental shrug and decided that he would take the invitation however poorly worded.

*****

When Buffy and Giles returned from the store, they found Hank and Crystal waiting in their room.

"Who let you in?" Buffy was not pleased.

"That Chip guy who runs this place. He said he thought we needed to talk." Crystal seemed unsettled by the experience. Or it could have been that she was still a bit green.

"All right. We talk." Buffy and Giles sat together on the end of the bed, regarding Hank with matching blank stares.

"Buffy, what are you doing here with this man? He's older than I am."

"I'm here with him because we're in love. Care to tell me about your little playmate?"

"For your information, Crystal and I were married this morning."

"Married?! "

"Hank, I don't feel so good."

"Please, allow me, Mrs. Summers." Giles led Crystal to the bathroom where she was noisily sick.

Buffy glared at her father.

"Tell me you didn't marry her because she's pregnant."

Hank refused to meet his daughters' eye.

"Two months."

"That's just great, Daddy. And when were you planning to tell me and Mom? Before or after the contractions start?"

"Buffy, it's not like that. I really care about her."

"Let me give you a clue Daddy; just because the little stick turns blue doesn't mean you've found the love of your life. And how old is she, anyway?"

"Eighteen. Today's her birthday."

"You've been screwing a seventeen-year-old and you're giving me lectures about age?"

"She's the same age as you."

"No, Daddy, she's younger. I'm nineteen, remember. Almost twenty."

A knock sounded at the door and Buffy went to answer it. On the other side, she found a seriously disheveled Wesley.

"Ah, Buffy, might I have a word with Mr. Giles?"

A retching sound was heard from the bathroom.

"He's kinda busy right now. What do you need, Wes?"

"Well, it's rather...private. Man to man, you know."

Buffy grinned. "You and Cordy, huh?" Wesley's furious blush answered her question. "Hang on a sec." She went to the nightstand and took three foil-wrapped slips. "Make 'em last. That's all we can spare."

"Yes. Thank you."

"And Wes?" He stopped. "Keep the noise down. We're having a big family pow-wow in here." She closed the door after his retreating figure.

"Buffy! Those weren't...what I think they were?"

"You can say the word. It's condom. Yes, I gave Wesley some condoms so that he can have sex with a girl and not have to marry her because of it. At least some of us have heard of Margaret Sanger and the good works she performed."

"You don't mean..."

"God, Daddy, when did you get so clueless? Yes. Giles and I are having sex. We can't get enough of each other. We're doing the horizontal tango and we like it. Not that it's any of your business, but I won't lie about this."

"You know I could have him arrested, don't you?"

"Arrested for what? We're both over the age of consent, and we both consent."

"What about when this started? You said he was your school librarian."

"He was. That's how we met, but we didn't start dating until a couple weeks ago. I was more than old enough to make up my mind by then. Besides, what did Crystals' parents do when they found out about you?"

Hank looked at the floor. "Told me they wouldn't prosecute if I married her."

"That's just great. So are you going to tell Mom, or do I get to be the one to break it to her?"

"I'll call her tomorrow."

"Take your wife back to your room. I'm really not up for more of this."

Giles brought the shaky, but no longer celadon, Crystal out of the bathroom and led her over to Hank.

"Mr. Summers, I believe it might be best if you took your wife to your room. I rather think she needs a bit of a lie down."

"Yeah. So I've been told." Hank glared at the man who had dared to touch his baby. "But you and me, we're having a talk later."

"Of course." Giles met his eyes steadily.

As soon as Hank and Crystal had left the room, Buffy began to cry. Giles went to her and wrapped her protectively in his arms.

"Hush, darling, it's all right." he crooned as he held her.

"Giles?" Her voice was muffled by his chest. "I finally figured something out. My Dad is a big jerk."

"I know, luv. Still, I feel it would be best if we make an effort to reach at least a truce with him. He is your father, after all."

"He doesn't even know how old I am. And he acts like he's never heard your name before. I talk about you all the time. I told him about you right from the start - not the Watcher/Slayer stuff, but the library stuff and the helping me study stuff. He acts like you picked me up in a bar last night."

"You and I both know that nothing could be further from the truth."

"But how do I make Daddy understand that?"

"I don't know. The one thing I do know is that my Buffy is an amazing woman who can do virtually anything she sets her stubborn mind to. You'll find a way. And if you don't, it's simply because there is no way it can be done."

"Thanks, Giles. I needed to hear that. I'll really try to fix things."

"And if you can't, perhaps I'll introduce your father to Ripper."

*****

"Oh God, Wesley! Mmmmm, that feels so good!"

Wesley pumped harder into Cordelia as she tightened around his manhood. A few more thrusts, and he joined her in orgasmic bliss.

"Oh, Cordelia!"

Exhausted, he rolled off the girl and disposed of the condom before taking her in his arms again.

"That was...wow. I had no idea you were so good."

"Thank you, Cordelia. May I say you were also...wow."

"I mean, who would have thought Wesley Wyndham-Pryce would turn out to be such a tiger?"

"Tiger, eh? Well, at least I seem to be moving up within the animal kingdom."


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