Title: Love, Hellmouth Style 9-10
Author: Gileswench
Contact: gileswench@yahoo.com
Feedback: Constructive criticism always welcome. Praise abjectly sought.
Disclaimer: It all belongs to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc., etc., etc. I just let them have all the fun Joss won't. I own nothing except my twisted mind which you really don't want. Please don't sue.



Buffy spent most of the weekend depressed. She tried to be cheerful for Giles and her friends, but nobody was fooled for a minute. The only time she regained her usual energy was during patrol, when she could whale on some undead ass to relieve her feelings.

Finally, Giles decided something had to be done.

When they woke up on Monday morning, Giles kissed his wife deeply.

"Happy anniversary, luv."

"Huh? Anniversary of what, sweetie?"

"It was three weeks ago today that you made me the happiest man on the face of the planet, Buffy. I think that deserves some recognition."

"Watchya got in mind?" She gave the most genuine smile she had in days.

"I've asked Anya to stay late and close the shop for me. I thought we might have dinner someplace special. After that, it's up to you. Dancing, a movie, a quiet evening in front of the fire; it's your choice. And no patrol. Xander and Willow will do a brief sweep."

"Can I think about what I want to do?"

"Of course. Now, I'd best get out of bed and ready for work. Be ready to go at six this evening. We can go to that horrifically expensive French place you've been wanting to try."

He kissed the tip of her nose before pulling her into a tight embrace, which she returned with great enthusiasm.

"I love you, Rupert."

"I love you too, Buffy."

*****

Willow looked up from her computer, annoyed at the interruption. She walked to the door and opened it to find an unfamiliar older woman with short blonde hair and a look on her face that indicated she was in the habit of sucking raw lemons for fun.

"Are you Willow Rosenberg or Tara McClay?" The woman asked without preamble.

"Um, I'm Willow. Who are you?"

The woman barged into the room, flashing ID as she went. "Lois Pennington, INS. I understand that you're a friend of Buffy and Rupert Giles."

"Yeah. What's this about?"

"I'd like to interview you and your...roommate about the Giles' marriage."

She gave the impression that there were quotation marks around the term.

"Well, Tara's not here."

"Good. I want to talk to you separately."

"Look, you can't just barge in here and...and...don't you need a warrant or something?"

"Ms. Rosenberg, the Giles' gave your name as one of their closest friends. You can tell me what I want to know or you can refuse to talk to me. Of course, if you refuse to talk, your friends will have no one to corroborate their story of everlasting love and Mr. Giles will be deported, while Mrs. Giles serves a long prison term for attempting to defraud the United States government. The decision is yours."

All the time she was talking, Ms. Pennington was setting up her tape recorder and notepad.

"Well, okay. But only so I can help Buffy and Giles."

"Good. Then we'll begin."

After a few basic questions to establish who she was and her relationship with Buffy and Giles, Ms. Pennington started pulling out the big guns.

"How long were you aware of a romantic relationship between the Giles' before they married?"

"Well, they didn't say anything about it until Buffy called to say they were engaged, actually. But they'd been dating a couple weeks, she said."

"And once you were aware of the engagement, how long was it until the wedding?"

"Um, about a day-and-a-half."

"I see. I understand you took some part in this wedding?"

"Yeah, I was the bridesmaid. The only one. It was a kinda small wedding."

"Were you surprised at their sudden marriage?"

"Well, yeah. I guess so. I mean, I didn't know they were together that way until, y'know, they said. But -"

"Is Mrs. Giles usually so secretive about her love life?"

"Not really, no."

"In the past, has she discussed her romantic relationships with you?"

"Of course. We're best friends."

"But she didn't this time?"

"They said they didn't want to say anything till they were sure where it was going."

"And what of Mr. Giles? Is he usually more forthcoming about his love life?"

"I wouldn't say he was. I mean, it took us all a while to figure out he was dating Ms. Calendar - she was the computer teacher at our high school. Until she was killed. It was really sad. And then none of us know when Olivia showed up, and we don't even know when they broke up. But I hadn't seen her in a while. "

"Can you tell me how to contact this Olivia?"

"No. I can't even tell you her last name, 'cause I don't know it. All I know is she's English, too. So I'm guessing she might be somewhere in England."

"So she would have been unable to help Mr. Giles with his predicament?"

"No, it's not like that. Giles loves Buffy. I know it. And she loves him too."

"I think I have all I need for the time being. Thank you, Ms. Rosenberg. You've been most informative."

"Informative?"

"Yes. I believe I have a very clear picture of the matter now."

Ms. Pennington gathered up her equipment.

"You realize, of course that you are not to discuss the details of this conversation to anyone?"

"Sorta like being on a jury?"

"An excellent analogy, Ms. Rosenberg. I'll see myself out."

Willow heaved a sigh of relief as the door shut behind the unpleasant woman.

"She's worse than Buffy said. I think I'd rather spend eternity running for Homecoming Queen against Cordelia than talk to her again!"

A minute later, she was out the door and headed for the Magic Box.

*****

Giles arrived home at six wondering how long he would have to wait for Buffy to be ready. As much as he loved her, he had to admit she was never punctual; a trait which drove him to the brink of distraction.

He was, therefore, quite surprised to find his wife dressed, coifed, and ready to go on time.

"Buffy, you look lovely, my dear."

"And if you sounded any more surprised, I'd have to hit you, y'know." Her smile let him know she wasn't really mad at him.

"I knew you would be beautiful, luv. I just didn't know you'd be ready."

"Well, there's a first time for everything; even me being on time. So come on, bring aft the chariot and let's boogie."

"Now I know it's really you. There isn't another person on the planet who could slaughter the English language so thoroughly in such a short space of time."

"Hey, what happened to the 'happiest man on the face of the planet'?"

"He's standing right here, luv, as happy as he was this morning. Perhaps even more so." He bent to kiss Buffy softly. "Shall we go?"

"Let's shall." She took his proffered arm, and they left.

*****

"Where's Giles?" Willow demanded as soon as she walked in the door of the shop.

"He left. He's taking Buffy out."

"When did he leave?"

The former demon shrugged. "About fifteen minutes ago."

"I've got to find them. Do you know where they were going?"

"Not really. But I wouldn't interrupt them if I were you. I think they're having sex."

"Not needing to know that, Anya."

"But you asked. What's so important, anyway?"

"Is Xander coming here tonight?"

"Yes. He should be here soon."

"Okay, and I left a note for Tara to meet me here. We're gonna have a Scooby meeting as soon as they get here. I think I just did something really bad and we need to figure out how to fix it."

*****

"Have you decided what you'd like to do next?"

Giles smiled at Buffy as she finished her chocolate mousse.

"I like the sound of that quiet evening in front of the fire you were talking about earlier. That sounded comfy and romantic. Just right for a three week anniversary."

"I must admit, I was rather hoping you'd choose that."

"But you thought I'd want to go Bronzing, didn't you?"

"The thought had crossed my mind."

"Nah. You hate The Bronze and tonight is about us, not just me. And before you do the guilt thing, I don't want to go there tonight anyway. I want to hang with you."

Giles reached for Buffy's hand across the table and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Then let's go home."

*****

A short time later, Buffy and Giles were curled up together on their living room floor on a blanket in front of the fireplace, sipping cocoa.

"Mmmm, this is perfect" Buffy sighed as she snuggled closer to her husband.

"It certainly is a pleasant way to spend the evening."

"So how come we don't do this more often?"

"If you'll recall, luv, you've a sacred duty which tends to keep you out late nights."

"What about Friday nights? Ever since we got married you push me out the door every Friday night to go Bronzing with the Scoobies. What's that about, anyway?"

"You know I want you to have as normal a life as possible. You need to spend time with your friends, Buffy."

"I spend time with my friends all the time. Will and I have almost the same schedule at school. I have lunch with her and Tara all the time. Anya works for you, so I see her almost every time I go to the Magic Box. Xand's always hanging around, and he patrols with me every time I let him. I see my friends. I spend time with them. I don't want to spend every Friday night playing fifth wheel at The Bronze. It's no fun."

"I thought you liked it there."

"I did when I got to dance once in a while. Now the only time I get on the dance floor is when Xander takes pity on me, and then Anya spends the rest of the night proving to me that I can't have Xander, who I don't want that way. It's no fun, Rupert. I'd rather be here with you."

"I'm sorry, Buffy. I really had no idea you felt that way."

"Besides, I hate that you're here all alone while I'm out having a rotten time. What do you do here all night anyway?"

Giles' face took on an odd expression as he pulled back slightly.

"It's nothing, really. Just a bit of a project I was working on."

"And that project would be...?"

"Doesn't matter now."

Buffy put down her mug and took the other from Giles' hands, setting it aside carefully.

"Rupert, talk to me. Is it...it's not something bad is it?"

Giles shook his head, his face unreadable.

"Then what is it? Would you please just tell me?"

Without a word, Giles stood and walked to his desk. He took out a key and unlocked a drawer, removing a packet from within, then returned to Buffy and handed it to her.

"Go ahead. Open it."

PART 10

"What is it?" Buffy took the package hesitantly.

"Open it and see."

Buffy did as she was told. Inside was page after page of Giles' precise, elegant script, punctuated by pen and ink drawings he'd done of them, their friends and their adventures on the Hellmouth.

"I don't understand."

Giles swallowed hard before answering. "It was to be a surprise. For the baby. I wanted her to know, you see. Who we are. How we came to fall in love. Everything."

"Her?" Buffy eyes were shining with tears. Giles pulled off his glasses and polished the lenses furiously.

"I had the foolish notion that it would be a girl. Silly of me, I suppose, but every time I thought of our child I saw a little girl with her mothers' eyes. And I wanted her to know all about us."

Buffy carefully placed the packet on the desk before returning to Giles and wrapping her arms around him.

"I think that's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. And you're going to finish it. Just because there's no baby now doesn't mean there won't be someday. And if you need me out of the way to work on it, that's okay."

"No, it's alright now you know. I simply wanted to surprise you, that's all." He sniffed somewhat unromantically into her hair. Buffy pulled back to look him in the face.

"You really wanted a baby, didn't you?" She stroked his cheek as she spoke.

All Giles could do was nod.

"So did I."

For a moment they just stood holding one another. Then Buffy giggled softly into Giles' chest.

"What's so funny, luv?"

"You. I thought I was the mushy one. I mean, I'm the one who cries watching It's A Wonderful Life every year. Now it turns out you're just as mushy as me."

"As I" he corrected her automatically. "And I'll thank you not to tell the others how 'mushy' I am. I've a reputation to uphold, you know."

"Nah. Your secret's safe with I."

"With me."

"I know."

*****

"I mean it, guys. She's like Cruella DeVille meets the Wicked Witch of the West with a little bit of Principal Snyder on the side."

"Come on, Will, nobody's that bad."

"Ms. Pennington is. And there's that hyper-calm attitude that's sorta like Adam was."

The other Scoobies listened with mounting alarm as Willow related her tale of her meeting with Buffy and Giles' caseworker.

"You shouldn't have told her those things. You should have lied."

"I couldn't, Anya. She's with the government. They could lock me up for the rest of my life for lying to them."

"Only if you get caught. Of course, you would. You don't lie well."

"Not helping, An" Xander told his girlfriend. "Look, Will, couldn't you have...I dunno, shaded the truth a little bit? 'Cause I'm thinking this is one case where the bald truth will get us a whole lot of Giles being deported."

"Shaded how? There's no shade I can see."

"What we need is a way to make Ms. Pennington see how much they love each other."

"Good idea, Tara. But how do we do that?" The witch looked at her girlfriend hopefully.

"I-I don't really know. If we could make her see their auras, there wouldn't be a problem."

"Their auras?" Xander sounded skeptical.

"Well yeah. Whenever they're together, their auras glow brighter and sort of melt into each others." Tara was met by blank stares. "Or maybe I'm the only one who noticed."

*****

"Come on, Mushy Guy. Let's go to bed." Buffy took Giles' hands and started toward the stairs to their bedroom.

"It's early yet. Are you tired?"

"Nope. Pretty energetic, actually."

"You know, you needn't do this if you don't want to. You did say the other evening that you felt uncomfortable making love during....well at this time of month. And it's perfectly fine with me if we don't."

"And I'm really, really glad you feel that way, but it's not that time of month any more. It stopped."

"Already? It can't have done."

"Hey, I was just as surprised as you, but I was there and it's over."

"But your period always lasts six days. I kept excruciatingly embarrassing records of your menstrual cycle for two years and in that time you were late, you were early, you had heavy flows and light ones, months when you were practically doubled over with cramp and months when you barely felt a twinge, yet it was always exactly six days."

"Well, this time it wasn't. Think of it as a consolation prize from the PTB for making us not have a baby right now.'

"Buffy, this could be important. I'm going to need to research..."

"No! No research. Not tonight. Tomorrow you can look for a prophecy involving me getting off the rag early, but tonight is about us."

"But the fate of the world..."

"Could be at stake. I got it. But tonight is our night off, and I'm not spending it with you going through a bunch of musty books looking for something I may or may not have to fight. We'll research tomorrow. Now, let's do the Pepys thing."

"The Pepys thing?"

"Yeah. You know, Samuel Pepys. Wrote a diary a long time ago in your native land. Ended lots of entries with "and so to bed."

"Of course, the Pepys thing. I should have known."

"Don't get snarky with me. I can cross my legs as well as the next girl."

"In that case, I might just as well stay down here with my books."

"Not when I went out and got some new flavors of massage oil just for tonight." She draped her arms around his neck.

Giles grinned wolfishly. "What flavors?"

"Come upstairs and see."

"You, Mrs. Giles, do not play fair."

"You, Mr. Giles, wouldn't want me to."

Laughing, she turned and ran up the stairs, Giles quickly overtaking her with his long legs taking the steps two at a time. At the top step, he swept her into his arms and carried her to the bed. He kissed her passionately before laying her gently down.

He pulled back slightly, stroking Buffy's hair.

"You know I love you."

"I love you, too, Rupert."

"Do you want to keep trying?"

"Yeah. I want a baby. Your baby."

Giles buried his face in her hair briefly before kissing her deeply.

"Then I shall do my best to give you one."

*****

"You know what would really convince those INS guys? If they had a baby." Xander looked pleased with his idea.

"What if they don't want one? Or can't have one? And isn't Giles a little old to be starting a family?"

"Again with the not helping, An."

"But she's right, in a way. We couldn't tell them they should have a baby just to convince the INS they're really married."

"Okay, Will, that's the high moral ground. But what else have we come up with? Tara wants to give them a special showing of auras and Anya wants us all to lie to the government. I say a baby is the answer."

"And I agree it would probably work. But do you want to be the one to talk to Giles about that? I don't. Not to mention talking to Buffy lately is not of the fun. And besides, it could take months for Buffy to even get pregnant, even if she wanted to."

*****

Giles removed the last barrier of clothing from Buffy's body. As he tossed the wisp of silk panties aside, he buried his face between her thighs.

"Oh God, Rupert! Yes!"

His tongue danced across her swollen nether lips, pausing briefly to lap at her distended clitoris. Reaching for the nightstand, he drizzled cocoanut-flavored oil over her sex before drinking her again.

Buffy's hips bucked of their own accord as she panted and moaned in pleasure. Her hands guided Giles' face to the spot she wanted licked. Again and again he swirled his tongue over the tiny nubbin until Buffy cried out in orgasm.

Immediately, he moved up to plunge his cock into her, making her cry out again. He took her lips in a hard kiss as his pelvis rocked with hers in a hard, fast rhythm,every stroke bringing them both closer to ecstacy.

Again and again he withdrew to the head of his cock and thrust himself back into Buffy's hot, tight channel. As she tightened further around him, he gave a final thrust and released his seed deep within her, only to lay panting atop his lover. His wife.

Buffy lay below him, glowing with pleasure, sated for the moment. She kissed every part of him she could reach, finishing with his mouth. As their tongues mingled, Giles carefully rolled them over.

He smoothed the sweat-slicked curls back from her face and smiled at her.

"What? Why are you smiling like that, Rupert? You look like the cat that swallowed Tweety-Bird."

"Something just occurred to me and I thought it funny."

"Share with the class?"

"Well, it came to me just now that if you and I have a child together, that'll make the investigation into our marriage look a bit silly, won't it?"

"So all this sex is just for your greencard?"

"Heavens no! It's also very good indeed for my fragile male ego."

Buffy softly thumped his chest with her hand.

"Watch it buster. If you don't come up with a good romantic reason in the next five seconds, I'm gonna hurt you."

"Let me see...romantic. Hmmmm, well, it could possibly be the best way I can think of to express how very much in love with you I am."

"I love you, too, Mushy Guy. Now, let's show those INS bozos."

She rocked gently over him, groaning as she felt him harden within her.

*****

"So it's official. Nobody can come up with a plan other than Buffy having a baby, and nobody's gonna be the one to tell them this. I guess we better get Giles a nice going away present and learn how to bake a file into a cake for Buffy."

"I'd say that about sums it up, Xand." The redhead agreed.

Four depressed Scoobies decided to go for coffee.


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