Title: Big Bad By The Bay 2/10
Author: Gileswench
Feedback: Constructive criticism always welcome. Praise abjectly
sought.
Disclaimer: It all belongs to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc., etc., etc. I
just let them have all the fun Joss won't. I own nothing except my
twisted mind which you really don't want. Please don't sue. Oh, and I
don't own The Simpsons, Indigo girls, or San Francisco either, but I
promise to put them right back where I found them.
Two tired, disgruntled women, a vampire, and a demon stopped in the hall outside their rooms.
"I told you guys not to talk to the deskclerk. Why do you never listen to anything I say?"
"I'm sorry, Cordy."
The vampire failed to look truly contrite.
"Sorry doesn't cut it, Angel. What did you think he was gonna say when he looked up at the mirror and there was no you in it?" She whirled around to face the demon. "And as for you, Mr. Subtlety, what's with the baseball hat?"
"Covers the horns, in case you haven't noticed."
"Doesn't cover the green skin, does it? You two nearly got us thrown out of the hotel. Do you have any idea how hard that is in San Francisco?"
"Look, could we all just calm down and try not to kill each other this weekend?" Kate pleaded. "We're checked in, we're all tired, and we have a big job to do. I think saving the world is a little more important than this."
"You're right. I'm sorry, Cordy. Next time I won't protect you when some little jerk with a stupid desk job decides to come on to you."
"Damn right, you won't. I can take care of myself."
Cordelia slid the keycard into the lock and opened the door to her room; the one she would spend the weekend sharing with Buffy and Kate. The women walked in and set down their luggage.
"So," Kate began, "does Buffy know Lorne and I are backing you up on this one?"
Cordelia began to gnaw at a fingernail.
"That's a really bad habit for an actress to have, you know," Kate offered.
"Don't you start on me."
"No, I just thought maybe you could try putting some iodine on your nails. That's what my dad did when I was a kid. It worked like a charm."
"Charm, I don't need. But a workout in the gym could do wonders for me. Wanna come with?"
"Maybe later. I want to look over what we've got again. See if I can get any clue what sort of demon we're looking at."
Cordelia shrugged.
"I thought we left Wesley back at the office."
The girl pulled a spandex workout ensemble out of her luggage and headed off.
"See ya' when I get back."
Kate mumbled a reply without raising her head from the computer printout she studied.
*****
"En guarde!"
The two combatants circled one another slowly. Anyone watching would have thought the result of the match was clear from the beginning. After all, the man was at least a foot taller than his petite opponent and obviously skilled in the art of swordsmanship.
Giles deflected Buffy's initial assaults efficiently. Her theatrical flourishes were no match for his longer arms and clean technique.
Still, she gained on him quickly. Her rapid thrusts became too frequent for him to parry them all. Her lightning speed reflexive moves stopped several attacks that would have taken valuable points from a slower swordswoman.
For quite some time, neither managed to score at all. Then one would gain a point only to be matched by the other.
A crowd gathered to watch the fight. Several spectators made bets on the outcome. Cordelia pushed her way to the front of the audience and immediately began to nibble at a fingernail.
The fight went on for some time. Neither fencer would give a point away if it could be helped. As time went on, though. Giles began to slow down. Buffy was able to find a way through his defenses more often. At last, the Slayer managed to defeat her opponent.
"Ha! I win, Giles! You get to buy dinner!"
"And we have an extra training session tomorrow."
"But I won. That was only if I lost."
"Or if you used too many moves stolen from Robin Hood films. Half the time I thought you were going to put someone's eye out."
"But I won. And nobody's looking all Oedipal. And you're a sore loser."
"Nothing a good backrub wouldn't cure. Double training tomorrow."
"Okay, okay. Double training. If your back holds out."
"That's enough of your cheek."
The smiles that wreathed their faces were proof that neither was serious in their bickering. Both stopped short when they saw Cordelia, still worrying her fingernail.
"Cordelia, hello. You and Angel must have made good time," Giles greeted her.
"Huh! You're telling me! We started way early. Angel was in a big old hurry to see you guys. I had to drive for almost five hours before he could take the wheel without frying."
"So he made it okay, right?" Buffy asked.
"Yeah, He's fine."
"Y'know, Cordy I like the new look except for one thing. What's with the raggedy nails? You never used to do that."
Cordelia immediately clasped her hands behind her back.
"It's nothing."
"Are you sure, Cordelia?" Giles cocked his head and furrowed his brow in concern. "I know the last time I spoke with Wesley he said your visions were getting worse. Could this be related somehow?"
"Guys, guys, it's really nothing. Just a bad habit I picked up. Angel's helping me with it. Really. I'm okay. Now can we talk about something else?"
"I think perhaps I ought to go clean up," Giles announced. "I'm sure Angel will want to discuss the situation soon."
With a small squeeze to Buffy's shoulder and a friendly nod to Cordelia, he left the girls to their own devices. An awkward silence ensued.
"So...Buffy...you're alive again. That's just great."
"Thanks, Cordelia." After a moment, the Slayer gestured to the Seer's outfit with the point of her foil. "Working out?"
"Yeah. Fencing?"
"Yeah. I think Giles likes it because he can still beat me every once in a while. But it happens less and less and that makes him grumpy."
"Angel's given me a few lessons, too," Cordelia announced in a slightly more emphatic tone that was strictly necessary.
"Really? I could go another round if you wanted to practice. I'll even go easy on you."
Cordelia's eyes narrowed dangerously as Buffy handed her Giles' foil.
Buffy faced her opponent with confidence. She felt certain she could bring Cordelia down in no time.
As for Cordelia, she seethed with anger. How dare Buffy think she couldn't hold her own? How dare she assume she could win at everything just because she was the Slayer and had returned from the dead not once, but twice? And what was with the pointers on how to hold her weapon?
Payback time had arrived.
Buffy was surprised when Cordelia began with a savage lunge that nearly disarmed her immediately. What's more, her balance was off. She was used to facing Giles. She knew how to fight a man of his size, and how to handle a left-handed fencer. She found herself a bit at sea against a girl close to her own height who fought right-handed.
Another fierce stab forced Buffy to stumble back a few steps.
Buffy gritted her teeth and went into nearly full Slaymode.
It didn't take Buffy long to regain her lost ground. She no longer underestimated her opponent. Cordelia's attacks were intense, but unfocused.
"Nearly as sloppy as mine," Buffy thought to herself. "No wonder Giles gets snarky about my D'artangon moves. And what's her saga?"
Then there was no time for thought.
The two continued to fight with an intensity that worried Buffy. It took her some time to find a level of response that would win without harming Cordelia.
Buffy made one final attack, her foil flashing wickedly in the air. With her superior reflexes, she was able to disarm Cordelia smoothly and held her own sword at the girls' throat.
For a long moment, the two simply stood panting and glared at one another. At last, Buffy spoke with as much calm as she could muster.
"I'm going to take a shower and then Giles and I are gonna go get some food. When I get back, you and me are gonna have a talk."
She stooped to retrieve Giles' sword. As soon as it was in her hand, she turned and left the room.
*****