Title: Odd Couples 15/16
Author: Gileswench
Feedback: Constructive criticism always welcome. Praise abjectly sought.
Disclaimer: It all belongs to Joss, Mutant Enemy, etc., etc., etc. I
just let them have all the fun Joss won't. I own nothing except my
twisted mind which you really don't want. Please don't sue.
A couple hours later, Buffy finished hanging bedsheets up so they blocked all view of the loft from below.
"I thought you understood they needed to be here the whole time," Giles said yet again. "How did you think this was going to work if they all just left?"
"And you didn't think to warn me that a bunch of your mom's relatives were going to be acting as an audience when we...look, I'll just feel better if nobody can actually see us...y'know. Tell me you weren't okay with an audience."
"I wasn't really looking forward to it, I admit, but I accepted it as an unavoidable aspect of the proceedure."
"It wouldn't be so unavoidable if you'd just rented a place with an actual door on the bedroom. Oh, and for your information, our next place is going to have at least two bedrooms with actual doors on them. Got that?"
He laughed as she blew a bit of hair out of her eyes and glared at him.
"I promise, Buffy. Our next home shall have as many doors as your heart desires. Now, you've blocked off all view of us. Come to bed, and let me hold you."
"Hold? Just hold me? Is that all you're gonna do?"
"Until you relax, yes."
"Okay, I'm relaxed," she said approaching the bed. "So what else you got?" She crawled onto the mattress and pulled him into her arms. "Feeling frisky?"
"Feeling lonely," he complained. "You've been at that screen so long, I thought I would have to try to fall asleep without so much as a kiss."
"Poor baby."
She caressed his cheek as she pressed her lips to his. In a flash, he'd taken over the kiss and rolled on top of her, pressing his body into hers.
"Definitely frisky," she giggled wriggling her hips against his growing erection. "I like you frisky."
He growled and kissed her harder, delving his tongue between her parted lips. As always, he felt his passion rise when she couldn't hold back a whimper of excitement. His hand moved to knead at her breast, he tore his lips from hers and moved his kisses down her throat. She ground herself harder against his groin.
"I want you so much," she whispered.
With that, he sat them up so they could both undress, helping each other and giggling in their delight at one another's bodies. She gave a small, half-swallowed shriek when he pulled her back down as soon as her last piece of clothing hit the floor.
"I love you," he said softly as his lips descended to hers once more.
Her only reply was to encircle his hard cock in her hand. He groaned and pressed into her touch. Her lightest caress thrilled him, her groans deighted him even when, as now, she did her best to keep silent. Some perverse corner of his soul decided he'd do his best to break her self-control and get her to let loose vocally.
He took one tight nipple between his lips and suckled hard at it. Buffy lay back more and allowed him his way, but barely made a sound. Giles moved a finger to her moist core, exploring gently, without rythym, until he wandered as if by accident to her most sensitive spot.
She gasped and raised her hips. He moved his head down her body until he could dip his tongue into her belly button. A small giggle escaped her lips, but that was all. Moving further south, he was rewarded with another soft gasp and a swallowed moan. All the while, his finger kept probing at her warm, moist sex. He decided it was time to stop teasing her
With one swift movement he lay atop her, pressing himself into her. Buffy opened herself to him, accepting him hungrily.
"So good," he whispered. "You feel so wonderful."
"So do you," she said. "Always."
He kissed her deeply and began to move within her.
*****
Vi sat on the sofa reading the latest issue of Archeology Today. She smiled to herself at the sound of creaking bedsprings and moans that couldn't quite be contained. If that baby wasn't conceived tonight, it wouldn't be for lack of effort.
A sudden shout from the loft made her jump slightly. What was Rupert shouting for?"
*****
"You minx," Giles giggled into Buffy's ear. "They'll have heard my reaction to that for certain."
"How was I supposed to know you'd jump and scream like that?" she laughed back.
"I'm not used to being touched there," he said softly.
"So...was it a good scream or a bad scream?"
"Well, I wouldn't say it was bad..."
"Really? Cool. Just don't expect that every time or anything."
"I didn't say it was good, either."
"So...what does that mean?"
"It means...I need to do some research."
"You are such a bad influence on me," Buffy laughed.
He kissed her hard and thrust himself more firmly into her tight burrow.
"And you'll be the death of me yet," he said. "But what a way to go."
*****
Vi smiled to herself as she made a pot of tea. the bedsprings were creaking heartily again.
*****
Time in the apartment passed slowly. Some days, Buffy felt like just racing out into the street to take her chances. Anything to be able to look at something other than the walls of her home. It was easier to keep her resolve once her test turned out positive, but she hated enforced inactivity. She missed her mother and her friends.
That, and the morning sickness was terrible.
"I don't know whose idea this was," she moaned one morning, "but if I ever find them, I'm gonna take my time slaying them."
"Actually, this is a good sign," Giles said in an offensively chipper tone. "Women who have intense morning sickness rarely miscarry."
"You've been reading again," she accused. "Stop that."
"Now, now," Vi said, "don't let yourself get upset, Buffy. Why don't you go back up to bed and I'll make you some dry toast and herbal tea. I'm sure you'll feel better after that."
Buffy glared at everyone on her way up the stairs.
"I just want to go on record: morning sickness should never happen after noon. And it shouldn't happen before eight in the morning. This twenty-four-seven version bites."
*****
Buffy was far more excited when she found she was too pregnant to go on wearing her ordinary clothes.
"Check out the stuff your mom made for me, Rupert!" She struck a pose next to her husband. A moment later, she pulled the book out of his hand and re-struck the pose.
"Hmmm...? Oh, yes, very nice, dear. Is it new?"
He ducked, but the book still hit his head.
*****
After six months in the apartment, Giles hit his breaking point. Six months with a Slayer in the throes of hormonal overload combined with an inability to so much as visit a book store had taken their toll.
Vi found him scrubbing mercilessly in the bathroom. No matter that every surface in the room gleamed and sparkled, he was still hard at it.
"I rather think it's clean," she observed wryly.
"I have to be...doing something," he said. He prowled the room like a caged animal. "I can't just sit here another day. I'm going mad, I tell you."
"Rupert, stop it. You're overwrought. Sit down and take a deep breath." When he simply glared and continued to pace, she tried again. "You're just going to upset Buffy more. Lord knows that's the last thing anyone in this place needs."
At that, he gulped and sat on the edge of the bathtub.
"I can't stand it, Vi. I can't. I thought I could, but I feel...trapped. I lived a quiet life before this - as quiet as a Watcher can. It never occured to me...I thought Buffy would have some difficulty, but I really never expected to have this much trouble coping with going nowhere. God help me, I want to go to...a...basketball game. The video arcade. The bloody Bronze! Anywhere. If someone took me to see a cheerleading competition, I'd kiss them right now. I can't bear another minute in here."
"Rupert," Buffy called from the next room, "I found this show about Egypt. Wanna come explain it to me?"
"At least she's showing some interest in something intellectual," he sighed. "I'll be okay now, Vi. Thanks for listening."
He stood and walked out of the bathroom like a man on his way to a firing squad. Vi shook her head as she watched him leave.
"There goes the bravest man I've ever met."
*****
With less than a week to go, Buffy was nearly impossible to be around. Her back ached, her feet were swollen, and everything she ate gave her indigestion. It was difficult for her to find a comfortable position to sleep in, and she was tired all the time. Giles barely dared speak to her some days.
At the same time, he had to practice Lamaze breathing with her, and calm her fears about parenthood. It was exhausting.
She'd finally gotten to sleep. He pulled the blankets more completely over her and watched her. As tired as he was, this was a sight he felt he could never get enough of.
Her hand rested protectively on the swell of her belly even as she slept. Her lips curled into a small smile. He hoped she was having a pleasant dream. Goodness knew she got few enough of those. He stroked her cheek gently, pleased when she gave a soft murmur and leaned into the caress.
Fearing to disturb her rest, he at last lay down behind her and turned out the light.
As much as he longed to watch her peaceful moment, he needed to share it.
"Goodnight, Buffy," he whispered. "Sweet dreams."
*****
"Rupert?"
Hmmm...?"
"Rupert, wake up. Now."
Giles peered at his wife. She looked oddly frazzled.
"Is is indigestion again?" he asked. "Or are your feet hurting again. Shall I massage them for you?"
"No," she gritted out. "It's not my feet. It's the baby. Ready or not, here it comes."
Giles blinked in confusion as Buffy sat up in bed and gave a hearty yell.
Downstairs, the Skloaths gathered in a circle and began to chant again.
"What's going on?" Giles asked. His brain seemed stuck in treacle. He knew he ought to understand what was happening, but every time he tried, his entire mind ran screaming.
"I'm in labor," Buffy said evenly. "That's what's going on. And I need to get to the hospital pronto."
With that, Giles sprang into action. It was the work of a moment to lay Buffy back down in bed and tell her everything was going to be fine. He raced to the closet to find the suitcase they'd packed for the hospital a week before. It was then that he remembered that he was in his pajamas and realized he needed to change his clothes. By the time he'd accomplished everything he needed to, the chanting had stopped and Vi was standing by the open door.
"The enchantment is broken. You are returned to the timestream," she told them. "Now go. I will make sure Daphne and Ernest are there in plenty of time."
Buffy and Giles thanked her hurriedly on their way out the door.
*****
Across town, Joyce rolled over and shook Xander awake.
"Honey? Xander, please wake up."
"Grnlf," he grunted and rolled over.
"Xander, wake up. It's important."
"Sure you can, babe," he muttered. "Money's on the dresser."
"Xander Harris!" Joyce smacked him in the arm. "Wake up!"
"Huh...wha...?" he said blearily as he struggled to become fully conscious. "Wha's up?"
"It's time."
"Time? Time for what?"
Before she could answer, Joyce cried out in pain and clutched the bedsheets.
"Honey?" Xander panicked. "What's going on? Are you okay?"
"Hospital," she panted, "now."
Xander, unlike Giles, failed to realize he was in his pajamas until he was out the door. At that point, he decided to ignore his clothes. If the hospital couldn't deal with his boxers and tee shirt, that was their problem.